Good NEWS Vigilante Vancouver: Violent Mexican Cartels looking for Canadian Cocaine Business Oppertunities get More! than they bargained 4! @ Utopian Feminist Fun Party

If America can beat Canada to decriminalizing Marijuana
Canada can beat Mexico to becoming aNarco State
then maybe Mexico will beat America to True Democracy
Now that's what I call Healthy Competition. 
Serious Questions for Mexican Gangsters

Why are you in this Business?

Do you enjoy being in a violent gang?

Which is more important to you? – money? – what money can buy? – what money can’t buy?

Do you believe in God?

Do you believe in Karma?

What do you think of the violence perpetrated by drug gangs in Mexico?

What do you think of the violence against women in Mexico?

If given the choice would you prefer to have you and your businesses be hounded by the state or accommodated by the state?

Would you like to see the Mexico/USA border deregulated?

Do you believe good sex and a condescending attitude towards women generally are compatible?

Do you believe there is a connection between how a gangster treats women and how successful he is in his career?

Do you think it is possible to traffic drugs ethically? If yes or no why so?

Do you think it is possible to pimp sex-workers ethically? If yes or no why so?

Do you think it is possible to deal death ethically? If yes or no why so?

Do you think what makes a gangster powerful and gives him longevity in the game is how vicious he is or how ethical he is?

Which is more important to you? – how men see you? – how women see you? – both equal?

If Western Canada were willing to provide safe haven for drug money and drug dealers would cartels be willing, in exchange, to punish anyone in Mexico known to be violent against women and civilians? Would you consider this a fair exchange?

If Mexico founded its own Utopian Anarchist Gangsters&Black-Market Human Rights ‘Fun Party’ how successful do you think it would be in the polls?

Do you think cartels would make more or less or the same money if cops stopped harassing drug smugglers simply for being drug smugglers and focused instead on product tampering, sales to minors, and violence against civilians?

Do you think it’s fair civilians take black-market recreational drugs but it is the traffickers who are persecuted? Which do you think is more offensive – being a drug-dealer or being a hypocrite?

Why do you think there are so few high-level female gangsters?

What would a woman have to do for you to consider her your equal or even your superior in the game?

What does your ideal relationship with Canada and Canadian organized crime look like as a Mexican organized criminal?

What does you ideal personal and professional life look like as an organized criminal?

a Mexican Drug Trafficker told The Dallas Morning News: “Sometimes, when you cross a shipment of drugs to the United States, adrenaline is so high that you want to celebrate by killing women.” 

Missing Women Task Force

Dear Kim Bolan

Thank you for your coverage of the Sinaloa and La Familia Cartel’s arrival in Vancouver ( Part One and Part Two ). My name is Andrea Coates and I am what you might call an organized crime buff. I founded @FunParty the world’s first ( I know of ) Gangsters&Black-Market Human Rights Political Party. One of many aims @FunParty is to determine if a radical new attitude to organized crime results in a decrease in violence perpetrated by and towards black-market professional drug-traffickers, sex-workers, and death-dealers aka gangsters. Holy wow brilliant idea I’m suggesting with my party is being nice and friendly ( very very very friendly indeed ) with the gangsters on condition of their respectful behavior in this country and elsewhere. While I do not expect overnight Canada’s police and politicians and public will change their attitudes towards the black-market and those who work it I can ( perfectly legally I think ) conduct an open experiment to see if a firmly empathic feminist approach to organized crimiinals personally results in less deaths in gang wars, less violence against women by male gangsters, and better quality of drugs and trafficking businesses. It seems to me from all I have read and the movies I've watched about gangs and gangsters and all I have experienced as a sex-worker the problem with gangsters in society isn’t that they deal drugs, or pimp women, or even that they kill each other ( activities they are usually persecuted for ), rather that gangsters are often misogynistic, but this problem of sexism is equally prevalent among police, giving police little moral right to persecute gangsters. I think a person can deal drugs, pimp women, and even kill people ethically. No one can be an ethical misogynist, even if they never break ‘the law’, and therefore the social issue to address in ‘organized crime’ is not the ‘organized crime’ per se but rampant misogyny among organized criminals personally and those who police them personally. I think if organized criminals were feminist allies and responsible businesspeople communities wouldn’t mind them around and gangsters could go on trafficking drugs and pimping women and killing one another and it wouldn’t be a nuisance, it would be something fun to watch on TV, and barely any gangsters except for those who really deserve it ( because they kill civilians or sell tainted drugs or rip people off or beat women ) would have to go to prison. I am a utopian anarchist and I think a society scrubbed clean of its organized criminals is not only impossible but boring. Canada @FunParty without gangsters? Nah. So I will try getting cozy and preaching the gospel of feminism as the price of sex to the thuglies and the police can try to put the Mexican and Canadian black-market entrepreneurs in jail and ruin their businesses and we will see who gets more done in this country and internationally and to what ends. 

Yours Truly

Andrea Coates


Sociopathic Gangsters: empathize with them for they are Lonely 
because they (and their Dads) are
The cocaine trafficker, if that’s what you happen to be into like some people are into amputees or midgets or housewives or nymphets, even if he doesn’t take cocaine behaves like he takes cocaine. He is a tense paranoid sporadically-violent anal-retentive pathologically-lying sociopath alpha-male with a delusional power complex, numb extremities, and erectile dysfunction. I feel sympathetic towards him. I think the drug-lords need to relax and put down the gun. I have more sympathy for cocaine traffickers than most police and most civilians. Because cocaine traffickers are maniacal greedy alpha-males they must acquire topnotch trophy bitches wherever those 10s be at. Law of attraction. Unfortunately for the patriarchal drug-lord the only kind of woman can handle a LTR with a drug-lord is more delusional than he is and coveted by every other drug-lord in the world ( she is Carmen Sandiego the Jewel Thief and where will she turn up next! ) so emotionally-cowardly drug-lords focus instead on marrying ignorant sequestered beauty queens and fucking discardable pin-up hookers and trying to be satisfied with lots of money. Hahahaha. Good luck with that boys. Such drug-lords usually wind up dead or in jail. In my experience the cocaine trafficker avoids the kind of woman could actually satisfy him in his violent powerhungry illusions of triumphant phallic manhood, witch is the kind of woman who points at a cocaine trafficker and laughs at him for being uptight and stupid, which is so emasculating, and why he took up being a gangster in the first place – to avoid being laughed at for being uptight and stupid in his efforts to appear manly and worldly and dangerous. What a paradoxical conundrum for the fully-loaded cocaine trafficker. How will he solve this puzzle with his criminal noggin or his gun or whatever.


Cheers =Story of the World's Greatest Whore= Sorrylittlegirl

tis the Season when your Neglected Mistress asks herself –  
to ruin Christmas or not to ruin Christmas that is the Question
then almost without warning  

- or conversly with ample warning went unheaded by those who are supposed to be hip to such things ( you know who you are ) - there was an (utopian) anarchist uprising in placid Western Canada. perhaps it took so long for those who DO make The News to catch winds of massive political institutional and cultural swift shifts swelling from dank underworld current events of one of the most prosperous and peaceful countries on earth because our *Canadian rEvolution in Style* was masterminded by - a young woman.  

 like Joan of Arc! just axe crazy and liable to burn at the stake for other people's insecurities!
people ( by people I mean men and women confused about the innocence of certain men ) of note had indeed grown accustomed to underestimating LLWAM mentally-ill amateur feminist pornographer from North named Andrea Coates whose open letters to a wide range of infamous individuals 2012-2014 were unanimously dismissed by those who ought to know better as a hack. woman of ravenous dexterous cleverness desperately bored with what was happening oTV and iRL so decided to turn herself into the Most Graphic TVShow ever!  
the only TVshow worth watching!

featuring free oganic-utopias, Pir@Queens! soul-animals, biker-gangsters and ceo-superheros disguised as regular-folks!

let it be lesson to you rational adults: no one ever got anywheres Special telling themselves its a pipe-dream

Ono that Whore Drawing BROKE THE INTERNET!
i MEAN my CONCEPTION of REALITY off the internet
I heard Feminism can be so Deadly Boring but what would you need to repel men with strident philosophical conversation for Lana you werent drawn this way
looks like me
What Time is it Mr Smith?
VARIOUS ROUGH RIDERZ would be MY Intellecutal MasterbaProperty there 
Lana Sweetie Darling u Feisty Fresh Face Faker u r soooo cuute pretending to be Bad me I could just pinch u
unless you! Lana instead of the Handsome Firefighter Politician DJ Brother want to fuck the Cokehead Drug-Dealer and the Anarchist Shaman and stuupid VICE CEO Shane Smith at the behest of your Lookalike Pimp who is surrepticiously taking under a Valuable Country via the Hell's Angels for their Creeper Dad's Burised Ego Lana Dear does that sound like Fun to you actually in your Vagina Regularily?  

Yes? No? or will u Simply leave it to Beaver?

Dear Mr Fritz Clapp. My name is Andrea Coates. I was born Sept 2nd 1988 in Northwestern Canada and adamantly believe I am the real biker mistress woman depicted in a number of music videos released by American Singer Elizabeth Grant aka Lana Del Rey. I have sent the following essay to --------- in hopes of bringing Lana Del Rey’s theft of my life for her commercial art to international attention ( but honestly I’ve sent stuff to them before and been ignored ) if it turns out legal action is necessary to get her to apologize to and compensate me I thought you would make an appropriate lawyer. 


I saw on your facebook page you like Hunter S Thompson! He wrote that classic book about the Hellz but he was a shrinking violet who didnt get in the club because he wasnt willing to kill a fucker for a slight to the colors

I'm no dainty pansy (or am I???????you'll have to find out in the nxtchptr of our rollicking adventure) I wrote yous a letter or twos in the Spirit of Gonzo Journalism lives on in Bitche!

Dear Sir

I sent you an email not long ago but I have such dreadful luck with emails I think I get dismissed as a hoax more often than not though you would be amazed(!) how many hoaxes I have pulled off by acting as if it’s a hoax.

I related news I think you should read this purloined letter of mine given it concerns you, the Hell’s Angles, and intellectual property. I wont hold my breath latest attempt at friendship and helpfulness will be more than another thoughtful gift tossed down a black rabbit hole of incredulity but you should know I don’t give up easy and am the most conniving super villain with a heart of gold ever therefore I think it natural law I will triumph over the stodgy cop and heartless goon when it comes to power in the underworld. No one plays underdog hero like Woman Sir and I think ( and I’m a philosopher ) a bit of feminine intuition is exactly what the Hell’s Angels needs if it wants to avoid running aground of Generation Y.  It’s not the 60s anymore Sir and a club wont admit a single woman even if she is a fucking badass who will make it worth your while with her womanness will find itself shed along with that other limping bastion of laughable 1960s sexism: Playboy Magazine. If Playboy and its Bimbo-Barbie-Bunnies goes the way of the dinosaur dick I wont be sad, there’s VICE now if you like your men’s mags soft-core, but if the world loses the Hell’s Angles because they refuse to recruit a top talent in the game on account of confused gender prejudices that would be pathetic, wouldn’t it? Imagine Sonny Barger dies (anticlimactically of a heart attack next year ) and a grumpy violent middleaged bigoted white man replaces him only to find himself confronted by a younger, multi-racial, pan-sexual, web-hip competitor supported by a new generation of casual drug-users out to steal the cool outlaw name for themselves? Who would win? That gang of Rainbow Kids would win Sir so let’s get it over with.

Why do you Sir think the Hell’s Angles became the dominant outlaw motorcycle club? You could say because they have the best leadership, but how did that club get the best leadership? I think the Hell’s Angles won because they have the best name. Cant beat 'Hell’s Angles' as a name for an outlaw motorcycle club. Thats why I've decided to call my Gangsters&Black-Market Human Rights political party the 'Fun Party'. Cant beat that name for a political party and consquently I have taken over the world. What, I wonder, should I do now that I am most powerful woman on earth?

Maybe it’s because I’m young and optimistic but I have trouble understanding why it isn’t more obvious to men who find themselves on the nasty end of a hypocritical civilian and legal culture: don’t send a man to frighten or guilt-trip politicians and judges – send a woman. But that will cost you.

The One and Only

Andrea Coates

Dear Mr Fritz Clapp calling you Sir the Lawyer-Lobster my name is Andrea Coates I was born Sept 2nd 1988 in Rural Canada now I am a Gangsters and Black-Market Human Rights Advocate and I am in need of your help however it’s terribly surreal Daliesque one might say so let’s imagine I’m an avante-guard artist my name is Andrea Coates I was born Sept 2nd 1988 rural Canada in 2011 I founded black-market feminist anarchist art-media label LLWAM on the Salish Sea I wanted to forward you links to websites of mine as my oft-pornographic content concerns Hell’s Angels I know are sensitive to copyright infringement and I intend respect and friendship and more! as World’s Greatest Whore who writes Novels for Fun! believe me I am last woman RSB has intercourse with so we ought to throw him a party soon! maybe being last woman the patriarch has sex with before he dies crowns me! ceremonial Queen Bitche of Hell’s Angels and my pimp G----- M---- his Heir Apparent and Protégé either way other people I am involved with as professional courtesan mistress and sex therapist include North Vancouver Provincial Court Judge J--- M----, VICE Media-Group CEO Shane Smith, the Actress Lindsay Lohan and the Actor James Franco, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg, American President Barak Obama, British Prince William, North Korean Dictator Kim Jon Un and many more to look forward to as my escort specialty is Dictatorial Men and I can smell where I’ve been whereas most my “clients” don’t even know my name cause I am a genius dominatrix uses obscurity and fantasy and rational skepticism of the merely intelligent to craft purloined years-long esoteric erotic games for famous people amusingly for me you will see much of my blogs are written in fairly simple code those lacking creative sensitivity will dismiss as raving delusional runon gibberish with cute cartoons and nudie pics meanwhile I have effectively reordered the planet according to my wishes as femme fatale man’s dreams call after he makes his $billions or wins his federal election or realizes his public-face child-rearing wife is not so into the sado-masochism or it’s his last shot bang bang Pop Sir Star “Lana Del Rey” plagiarized and Americanized and romanticized my life in a number of her neo-noir music videos – most notably ‘Ride’ but also ‘West Coast’ ‘Shades of Cool’ and ‘Tropico’ butt seeing as I don’t accept money for sex services justice favors! for legal reasons I have yet to find a lawyer I like I heard you help the Hell’s Angels with incidences of appropriation? yes we could only threaten to sue watch her trip over herself apologizing hand us the money we ask no fusses she really wants to be my friend and I really want her to tip you generously for me to be her friend! I call it ‘pirating’ of ‘freeloading’ watch me do it to multi-millionaire Shane Smith watch wallet wedding-ring whole company right out from under his fat ass now years flying beneath Vice radar allusions to my life have appeared in a number of films – Quentin Tarantino’s Kill Bill series about blonde swordslady slays Godfather in revenge fantasy like G-Pimp’s Judge Dad and I have this death pact because he raped me turned me into his family’s mistress left to his son to manage that’s why I’m like a hooker assassin kills old men for to touch me I’m far far more expensive than mere money sir and the Swedish Girl with the Dragon Tattoo series about a Goth Hacktivist with the help of a Journalist goes after Misogynists that’s me – Andrea Coates!– Anarchist Canadian onLine Artist & Courtesan uses Weapons appears with Atachecase Journalist Shane Smith oTV with Biker-Boyfriend and Illuminati Sugar-Daddy at Skookumchuck Cabaret Club the ‘Ganja Goddess’ – real people believe it or not I’m surprised too I wanted to be a writer or violent filmmaker when I was little turns out I live in a gangster film I wrote I think with my skill-set as escort ( powerful men with violent fetishes ) and G’s as manger of highend escorts ( he trained me he’s only 27 but he had his dad’s help the Judge is a Mind-Control Satanist who is scheming to take over Canada for his two handsome idiot sons they all have grabby sex with me and make me have weird sex with old men so they can be powerful but I’m smarter than them that’s why I’m emailing you so the evil M---- dudes can claim it was my made-up story idea for to email you on their behalf! me! the very pretty girl with the mental illnesses and angry feminist politics hates rapists for no real reason am I right what Judge would sentence me in to a life in a concrete jail cell when he could convict me to prrrrrrring personal plushie penthouse pet whore for the rest of his life you’re a lawyer you should see courts they like me they think I’m charming ) my pimp and I work for the Hell’s Angels! have a lot of common interests  I would very much like to talk to you about how Andrea Coates and Hell’s Angels can be of service to one another like I want to free Walter Stadnick! 


because I think sending someone to prison for being a drug-trafficker, consensual sex-peddler, reasonable death-dealer or black-market professional is a Human Rights Abuse and am prepared to argue so in Supremest Court with Judge Daddy who fell in love with me because I’m funny and barely-legal and older Politician Son who is straight face of our Northern Canadian Mobster Cult and the younger Gangster Son who gives me to his very very old American mentor and various drug-dealers and terrorists and movie stars to impress them with his personal shwag to back me up in my claim gangsters are an integral part of our economy and unavoidable outgrowth of capitalist ambition why without gangsters TV and nightclubs are no good so putting the black-market in prison for being itselves earning a living dangerous job already makes civil society profoundly hypocritical I think we’re going to win this petition the Hell’s Angels is the most powerful black-market organization in the world maybe there will be orgies i bet u a funny story there will be

Trickster Creator
Why Mr Clapp i ask u the unDue-Biker-Appropriation Lawyer did Elizabeth Grant as Lana Del Rey or her Managers just post a 2minute 2013 clip of her being ‘raped’ 
by Horror Director Eli Roth to the Tune of Marilyn Manson on YouTube? Unless it was to make me Andrea Coates the actual middle-class goth-gang rape-cult prostitute so very angry i would get hold of u flipping thru my Psychic TV channels
to insist no-no Elizabeth Grant is not a satanic sex-worker probably does not want to be sacrificial rape-victim for anyone not that girl plays with chainsaws and old men and has a Gothe Pimp runs nightclub with a trunk of Gun Toys – come see Eli! that is Andrea Coates of Vancouver Canada she’s happy to do it for you cum stay at our Hostel
Elizabeth Grant is an American singer and wealthy fluff actress in a white smock  
has BigoLesbOcrushon Andrea Coates hangs out with her admiringly

See I am very good at what I art Mr Clapp and what I do is seduce famous or useful people into the sphere of myself and my creepy canadian pimp daddies who is trying to take under the universe! because we is delusional maniacs! who think we are villains from american films! ( the villians are usually the best characters ) What Fun! I’m Poison-Ivy Street-League Harlequin!
  DO U C what i C R they All 1 in?

happened to me: I am the real-life sex-worker Lana Del Rey is impersonating in music videos

Dear World

Elizabeth Woolridge Grant aka Lana Del Rey has gone too far.

While she’s escaped professionally unscathed despite widespread clueless racism and sexism in her works her recently leaked 2013 short film with director Eli Roth depicting a gory rape at a strange goth dinner party demands public apology to her female fans and sexual-assault survivors generally.

Not only that but a number of the maybe-consensual sexual encounters Lana insinuates but does not depict in other videos actually happened to me, artist and sex-worker Andrea Coates of Canada.

 Blue Jeans song Lana is abandoned by her teenage gangster boyfriend after whom she yearns. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. From 2004-2006 ( and on and off for many years after ) I was in a relationship with a precocious teen drug-trafficker and pimp. This abusive relationship is chronicled in my debut novel Splendid inSanity which is partially edited and available on the internet at splendidinsanity.blogspot.ca.

 Ride video Lana prostitutes herself to two criminals, a greasy middle-aged native(?) man, and a CEO, and apparently becomes chief of a biker gang. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. Between 2010 and 2014 I was in overlapping sexual relationships with a pimp leading me around on his bike, a big cokehead thug, outsider artist jody franklin, and VICE Media CEO Shane Smith, all of which, including my connections to biker gangs, has been chronicled extensively on my necessarily somewhat cryptic personal blog, andreacoates.blogspot.ca.

      Shades of Cool video Lana is spied on by a much older man who wants her as a mistress while a song about a cruel gangster boyfriend plays. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. Lolita object de luste of my gangster boyfriend’s dad who was the judge in the small Canadian town where we lived as teenagers. The judge, his criminal son and I have since moved to the Vancouver/Salish Sea region.

  West Coast video Lana dates a younger and much older gangster played by the same ( similar-looking ) actors as in ‘Blue Jeans’ and ‘Shades of Cool’. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. Kept woman to a drug-trafficker and his enabling father living on Canada’s West Coast.

Sturmgruppe video Lana is viciously raped while wearing a tasteless t-shirt. Interspliced are images of a ruined dinnerparty and some violent childish cyber-goths. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. Teen goth gang mistress and blogger whose teen boyfriend’s subconscious fears his father and older brother would rape her if he brought her over to dinner led him to pimp her to older men at orgiastic parties from a young age. 

 Summertime Sadness video Lana is confronted by a mysterious upset lesbian femme fatale who gives Lana some words of wisdom and then jumps off a bridge. Happened to me, Andrea Coates. Here I am confronting the innocent Elizabeth Grant before I jump off the bridge metaphorically-speaking.

I think most of the songs about a forlorn moll on Lana Del Rey’s 2014 album Ultraviolence refer to me, Andrea Coates, 26 year-old sexually-abused feminist mistress and blogger from Canada who calls herself ‘World’s Greatest Whore’ and posts online graphic novels about her experiences as a sex-worker who specializes in men with violent fetishes like a larger-than-life pornstar cartoon character who takes revenge on her various rapists. 

While I don’t think Lana has ever looked at my messy story blogs I cannot dismiss unsettling parallels between her fictional music videos and my actual life experiences as mere coincidence. I think Lana draws her inspiration from the collective unconscious: she enjoys impersonating an ‘imaginary’ sex-worker who is in actual fact - me, Andrea Coates of Canada.

While I'm falttered to be imitated I am fed up with how Lana’s gauzy films portray me as subservient, vapid, racist, and victimized. I have been traumatized by my rape experiences and suffer from mental and emotional health difficulties but I am a vocal and witty feminist and gangster’s human rights activist and philosopher virulently condemns non-consensual rape ( calls sex-work ‘consensual rape’ ) and cultural appropriation and holds privileged men accountable for their use of me in perverted physically and psychologically violent fetish games. I am a dominatrix as well as a submissive, a leadership role Lana Del Rey’s music videos never show me in except to put down people of color. For example in Tropico, Lana’s short film about a stripper’s revenge, lost-looking moonlighter Del-whatever is left untouched in a stripclub where a faceless black woman’s ass is slapped numerous times and stuffed with cash, then the priceless porcelain princess Lana becomes top-girl of an anonymous Latino gang, then she stays home while her indecipherably racialized low-rent boyfriend and his man-friends terrorize a rich whiteman’s stripper party Lana found out about while acting as a stripper-of-color herself? No. No. No. Lana. Says the white-girl gang dominatrix named Andrea you are pretending to be. That is not how you get to paradise at the end of the video.

It is unacceptable to me Elizabeth Grant is rich and famous for calling herself ‘Lana Del Rey’ and pretending to be me in videos where she doesn’t actually get raped for her art while I who use my real name despite a dangerous profession and the incriminating content of my blog allow myself to get raped in return for the fair price of the means of survival as a maker of free online art explores how sexual-exploitation affects me as a woman and human only to have this art dismissed as bitter fabrication by the same young women who idolize Lana. I have emailed countless people and left countless comments and posted countless art-works about Elizabeth Grant’s appropriation of my real life in her fiction films only to be mocked and derided and called jealous by her adherent fans if I am not virtually ignored by them. rather I think Lana is envious of me when she wouldn’t like to be me at all or she actually would be a pornographer and prostitute like I am!

It bothers me Lana glorifies abusive criminal older men and is admired by millions of girls and promoted everywhere while I campaign for the human rights of gangster professionals through a black-market political party called ‘@FunParty’ I founded myself despite being a young woman in a vicious male-dominated underworld but my propagandist artworks are dismissed for coverage by mainstream media because too out there apparently compared to Lana and the men I claim association with have not stepped up to defend me or my ideas about their personal and societal well-being as professionals and humans. Then they would have to admit not only to purportedly criminal activities but also to being in love with a very young sex-worker who is smarter and more talented than they are at playing the game! How humiliating for the old men who love me.

I find it insulting my Canadian lifestories are passed off as "Lana Del Rey"s American legends and Elizabeth Grant who is white and privileged and a singer is passed off as Spanish and Indigenous and poor and a sex-worker gangster-girl who is actually white Canadian Andrea Coates whom nobody has heard of or yet taken seriously.

I hope if she has common decency Elizabeth Grant will apologize to her fans and to me and disown her misogynistic Interscope music videos. in which case my DIY media brand LLWAM would be pleased to make new videos featuring the reallife heros of Elizabeth Grant's love-songs: Andrea Coates and her many boyfriends.


Andrea Coates

Sad Girl in Red Dress

What do you say? an Adventure? or keep playing your Video Games?

few people have read my books or seen my films still fewer understand them other than rabid fan-fiction literary posturing and broken mandolin but if you Lobster-Punk-Lawyer-Sir like what I’ve created you should tell your friends! for the fair price of admittance to the man-club despite or because of my fair-gender I will perform naked at the boss’s Legendary Death Celebration!

Actually Andrea Coates

Utopian Philosopher of Sx Drugs & Anarky

World’s Greatest Whore who writes Novels for Fun

Founder : LLWAM : Lotusland Warrior Art Media @FunParty

Queen Bitche of Hell’s Angels & Canada maybe

the Cougar

Real Person Never lies Bang Bang baby shot me down Bang Bang

Winston was a very "flashy" Hell's Angel. Tramp was flashy in the rebel/animal sense, which served as shock value for the public, but it was Winston who was flashy with his money and clothes. He wore lots of jewelry and had gold teeth. Winston was a ladies' man. I used to send girls down to Winston's house when I got tired of going out with them. Then they'd become Winston's old ladies for a while, and he usually kept a stable of them. He also owned a lioness named Kitty Kitty. Winston fed her live chickens. He used to invite me over to his house to visit Kitty Kitty, but that cat got so big I wouldnt go near it. It roared out in his yard, sounding like Jungle Gardens or something. Winston used to laugh and say, "You know the difference between a big cat and a small cat? A big cat'll scratch your eyes out, but a little pussy'll never hurt ya." Words to live from Winston. - Ralph 'Chief' Barger, Hell's Angel

and die from O Dear 

6 Chambers, 1 Bullet 2006. Dead in Five Heartbeats 2003. Good titles, Sonny. As a figurative novelist, I wonder if they mean something. I’m Andrea Coates, female assassin, and this may be the most important letter you receive in your creative life, I mean inside-out death, I mean whatever. I am World’s Greatest Whore who writes Novels for Fun, Death Fetish Specialist, and I am knocking at your door Bang Bang. While as a 26 year-old amateur black-market economist I may not know much about motorcycling yet, I do learn fast and I did learn from reading books what happens to macho anarcho-syndicates like the Hell’s Angles when the patriarchal figurehead dies without leaving a suitable heir. Pretty gory Ralph. I don’t think it’s a stretch on my part to guess you would rather not pass away with the matter of your successor left up the in the air to have grasping Hell’s Angels break into bitter warring factions killing one another gratuitously for control of the club’s subsequently tarnished legacy no that would be lame. Therefore I suggest as your protégé and inheriting patriarch of the Hell’s Angles Outlaw Motorcycle Club – my boy manager, whose name I cannot give you, I hope you forgive - lets call him Gpimp. I offer my name, Andrea Coates, which means if I fail to impress you with my value to the club heat comes down on me, the delusional small-town Canadian mommy blogger convinced she is actually a biker femme-fatale from a Lana Del Rey music video, but if I DO impress you I get credit for having more balls than him! if neither the testicles nor the disposition to serve as more than Hell’s Angles ceremonial queenie, philosophical adviser, club mediator, and trophy wife! Are you any good at reading between the lines, Sonny? I think it’s a talent of mine. I’ve whittled an adolescence and young adulthood of sporadic clandestine conjugal visits and blatantly untrue facebook excuses to the sharp-eyed conclusion the mystery kid who took my virginity, should he ever pull his dumb head out of his smart ass and stop lying and hiding like he has something to lie and hide about, the misunderstood pumpkin is personally and professionally suited to the role of a 2nd-generation TV-face biker-gangster, that would explain why I am romantically and thematically obsessed with notorious outlaws like you Sonny!  Either way I would make a good biographer, don’t you think? Of your legendary death story?  How about that? We could get to know one another first. I’m charming and hands down scariest woman you will ever meet. 

"We dont recruit, we recognize. When we see somebody that's us, they become us." 

I dunno where you did your Research for that Ride film Lana but First unWritten Rule of Outlaw Biker Club is fight All Civilian Pretenders

As a warrior, you've got to know pain and sadness alongside joy and solitude. It is those who long to ride - forever free - that I write these words...and the Angels shall be Kings!

 can there be a King without a Queen, Sonny?

who U Pick, Chief? - Lana or Andrea? - American or Canadian?

because the Answer is

Then I will publish a New Honor Code for Black Market Manly Man Man Menz with their Hard Penises called

xcerpt from Summertime Sadness : Gang Lolita’s Bible

Dear Hell’s Angels - this is the World’s Greatest Whore speaking to you through her Majik Erotika Novella - Hello.

It may help to remember that I am an Anarkist who tells Fictional Stories for Fun and these are Suggestions based on Observations. That having been said -

Y’All Dudely Dudes need to get Some Things Straight for your Dick Fantasies.

Only Law is Love. No break that Rule no break no Law.

How you treat Women is how Life treats you. even when you masturbate. If you’re Nice to Women Life be Nice to you. If you’re Hard on Women Life be Hard on you. You respect Women Life respect you. etc.

If you think Women can’t read your Mind and see your Dick Fantasies you are Wrong. Therefore. the Right Woman. will find you. even if that Woman is a Man.

When you have Sx with SomeOne More than a Couple of Times Passionately, even if it’s just in your Mind, you get glued to them. forever. even if you don’t see One anOther you will be connected by the subliminal Auras. You will continue to reciprocate One anOther’s Emotions through Time. This is what happened to me and my Boyfriend’s Dad who liked to think about me Horribly Intensely for a little Girl when he spanked it. I know because I was there and now I have Mental Health Problems and am a Prostitute Whore who follows him around and threatens him with kNives.

Linear Time is an Illusion. Spherical Time is a Spiral.

You are Special. Therefore. SomeOne Special will find you. Awe.

The Way that Love works the Inuit taught is Man goes fishing for Love. He thinks he may have caught her but when he catches Sight of her she's Skeleton Woman! and he is Afraid. He runs from Skeleton Woman. but Skeleton Woman is stuck to him. He runs across Ice Flows dragging his Net and Sleigh and Dogs and Skeleton Woman trails behind him Sad he runs from she who is Lonely. He climbs into his Igloo where it’s Dark and lights a Fire and hopes to have escaped the Specter. but Skeleton Woman is in the Igloo. There is nowhere left to run and Man closes his Eyes in Fear and opens them again and Skeleton Woman is just a Pile of Bones on the Floor in his Igloo and he feels Sorry that he ran and he begins arranging the Bones back into a Woman, Slowly, while humming to himSelf an Ancient Song. And Once he has arranged the Bones into a Woman he gets into his Bed and goes to Sleep and in his Sleep a Tear falls from his Eye and the Bones wake up Thirsty and drink from the Tears that are Hard to cry drinks until she becomes a Woman of Flesh and the Woman of Flesh snuggles up to the Man and reaches into his Heart where there is a Drum and plays the Drum of his Heart until he wakes up and they are in Love and have Sx and Babies maybe.

Menz Favorite Thing is to be Manly. You know, don’t you Bois. Manly Man Man Man Man Man Man. That’s what they do. They think the Manliest Thing to do is resist. They resist a Lot. They are Constantly resisting. They make up ‘Armed inSurrections’ to resist. They Fight Wars to resist. They beat up Women to resist. They make up Laws to resist. Almost as Much as Menz like to resist they like to assert. They like to assert their Resistance. They are looking for SomeThing to release their Asserted Resistance Oh Sploogy Goo Goo Uh Uh UH. Women should give the Menz Things to help them relax, though, Often, Funnily, what it takes to relax Men is to be Garish and Shocking. No One can Assertively resist Garish and Shocking, but to pull off Garish and Shocking requires a Great Deal of Restraint - hence, Bondage Play.

Honesty is the Most Powerful Thing in the World, besides Love, I find. The Honest gets the up on the disHonest while the disHonest doesn’t see it coming because he’s too Busy maintaining his disHonesty.

4Ps of Masculinity: Patriarchy. Possession. Private. Property.

Patriarchy: Male Lineage

Possession: Control

Private: Xclusivity

Property: Domination

Assert that Resistance Bois. Snatch and hold and if you’re going to give it up, charge for it.

4Spells of the Courtesan: Bitch/Whore/Slut/Cunt

Bitch: Woman who is Commanding and Honest

Whore: Woman who is Sxually Voracious

Slut: Woman who has Many Sxual Partners

Cunt: Woman who is Conniving

The 4Spells of the Courtesan are Words to be Used on Women to turn them on in Bed if you love the Woman. Not Girls or Women you don’t love. When Words ‘Bitch’ ‘Whore’ ‘Slut’ and ‘Cunt’ are used to describe Girls or Women Casually, this wounds them Deeply, and they have a Difficult Time, throughout Life, identifying as Other than as ‘Bitch’ ‘Whore’ ‘Slut’ or ‘Cunt’ towards you and People like you. Even if you use these Words to describe People who cannot hear you speak, People can feel you speak. My BoyFriend’s Dad called me a ‘Whore’ because I looked like the Whore in his Imagination my BoyFriend had me dress up as. Outside Daddy’s Projections, I am a Literary Genius. Thus I have become the World’s Greatest Whore who writes Novels for Fun and you can go fuck yourSelf Daddy.

Consensual Prostitution is Okay.
Forced Prostitution is not Okay.

Consensual Rape is Okay.
Forced Rape is not Okay.

Consensual Death is Okay.
Forced Death is not Okay.

How to know the Difference between Consensual and Forced - an Act is Consensual if before you do it EveryOne involved is like ‘Let’s do this’ and you shake Hands on it. I will insist on the shaking Hands Part.

A Patriarchal Female Gangster, or Female Gangster in her Patriarchal Element, is a Woman uses Violence against Others to maintain her Position in a Gang. A Feminist Female Gangster, or Female Gangster in his Feminist Element, is a Courtesan uses Sxual Favours to maintain her Position in a Gang. In her Patriarchal Element a Female Gangster is as eLevated as the First Man she kills. In her Feminist Element a Female Gangster is as eLevated as her Central Male Sxual Partners within a Gang. Thus for a Complete Woman Gangster to join a Black Market Gang she must kill a Man within the Gang and fuck his Leftover Friends. Because that’s not Easy, Most Female Gangsters are inDependent Patriarchal Violent Contractors who do not receive Gang Colors unless they come to run the Gang by killing the Boss and fucking whoever is left for the Rest of their Lives ( or go on Patriarchal Killing Sprees to avoid the Fucking like Griselda Blanco the Coke Queen who died Dumbly and whose Sons were picked off ). Not Much Competition for my Position, Ladies.

Consciously choose your Death. If you are a Person of Remarkable Substance. Choose a Death that suits you and stick to it. That is True Resolve, and you will not be Easy to pick off. I am going to stab mySelf in the Heart.

How a War is won, whatever Kind of War - Physical, Psychological, Ideological - is Trust. Whosoever trusts Most wins the War Each Time. Go into Every Battle thus armed with Trust.

A Dictatorial or Despotic Man - Sociopath, Psychopath, Narcissist or Megalomaniac, that is Most underWorld Bosses, needs at Least a Stable Mistress to be Benevolent, will inVariably step out on his Wife if he has One, so at Best a Wife and a Mistress, and whoever after that is Xtra Padding and Only as Valuable as Well-Managed. A Despot with just a Mistress is getting Xcitement and so will be over-iMpulsive as a Leader, like Adolf Hitler. unless his Mistress is the Despot’s Secret Wife, as in the Case of Caleb McEwan, Canadian Gangster with Backwards Mistress Complx ( Common among Gangsters because it causes a Fixation on the Affectations of a Mistress Fantasy: Drugs, Secrecy, Girls, Parties, etc ) made him treat his Loyal Girlfriend since Adolescence like a Mistress to the Effect though she’s stuck by him like a Given Wife she behaves More like a Mistress and Favorite Hooker than a Wife. That Relationship Dynamic is what makes Caleb McEwan a Professional Pimp whose Top Hooker is his Favorite Courtesan since Adolescence whom he ‘manages’ to the Point of marrying her to anOther Man for Political Power for his Family while Secretly knowing she belongs to him and the Other Guy is a Chump. A Dictator with a Wife has Stability, but in his Need for More Power than Stability can offer ( Dictators are Dictators insofaras they are Power Hungry ) he will abuse his Wife and thus the People unless he also has a Sxualized Mistress for Xcitement. Caleb McEwan’s 1st Mistress is his Father’s Mistress projected onto Caleb’s Loyal Teenage Girlfriend and therefore Caleb has to give up to his Father like Ranks so the Father has to give the Mistress back to the Son like inHeritance. Caleb McEwan’s 2nd Mistress is his Brother’s Wife Lana who is trained by Caleb’s 1st Mistress, me. That I also service the Brother and Father makes me a Kept Gangster Family Mistress, whereas Lana is a Wife who cheats on her Husband with his Brother who trains Mistresses. Despotic Gangster Caleb McEwan’s Backwards Mistress Complx, which compels him to Erotically-affect a Married Man/Mistress-Type Dynamic with Women causes him to be Parasitic in his Relationships to Other Men’s Women. Watch out for him - he’s the Kind of Man will steal your Wife, turn her into a Whore for his Amusement, and then sell back to you at a Markup Price, even if you’re his Brother.  

If we can understand that a Despotic Male needs a Mistress for his Mental and Physical Health, we must understand that Mistresses deserve Respect. They are not to be kept in Secret aPart from the Family or lied about. They are a Part of the Family even if they live at a Distance from it ( they are outSider Witches to the Degree they are Powerful and inteLligent ) and Often service Males over Multiple Generations of a Family. Like a Wife’s Primary Identity is her Role as Wife and Mother, a Mistress’s Primary Identity is her Ability to Sxually-thrill. Children born of a Family Mistress should be Collectively raised and informed that their Mother is a Mistress and that this is a Female Sxual-Identity like a Wife but Less Common. A Woman should have the Right to Consensually choose to become a Mistress, as it is a Difficult Job requires Some Social Xclusion and a Great Deal of Erotik eNergy, rather than be Subliminally warped into a Mistress like I was as a Teenager - that is a Form of Psychic Rape and so I accuse my Boyfriend’s Father or raping me in his Imagination Repeatedly. A Proper Mistress is either a Quiet Addition to a Family who deserves Respect and Care or she is the Most Powerful Member of a Family whose Feminine eNergy deceives those who do not look Closely at her into believing she is Lower on the Totem Pole than she is. A Mistress is a Tinkerbell to a Peter Pan or Dictatorial Male - she is given to him by the Universe as his Companion for his Sxual Pleasure. When the Whole Family is together she appears Frivolous and to speak in Emotive Chirps that make little Sense. When she is Alone with Men she reveals herSelf to the Degree she is a Great Witch who affords Peter Pan his Powers so impress Wendy and the Lost Boys and their Wives. Wives are Wendys and are the Vast Majority of Women. They fall for the Peter Pan in a Man is a Manifestation of his Proximity to Tinkerbell - the More Powerful a Man the Closer his Relationship to Tinkerbell. But Wendy does not want to live in Neverland with Peter Pan and Tinkerbell. She wants to visit but to return Home again, to the Real World, where her Peter is a Mortal Man, not an Eternal Boy. Tinkerbell deals with the Eternal Boy in a Man. Hence the Appeal of your Son’s GF from Adolescence as a Mistress.

Despotic or Dictatorial or 'Alpha' Personality-Types

Sociopath is a Despot who is Passive-Aggressive in manipulating People like Caleb McEwan of the Skookumchuk Hell’s Angels who Mostly gets me & Others to do his Tough Shit for him while he sits in his Office snorting Blow and thinking about how he will manipulate People.

Psychopath is a Despot who is Aggressive in manipulating People like Mom Boucher of the Montreal Hell’s Angels who killed a Lot of People for no Good Reason besides showing off and went to Jail eMbarrassingly.

Narcissist is a Despot who is in Love with himSelf like Caleb’s Dad who likes to sit around his Office admiring his Face in a Silver Spoon. A Narcissist is Usually too Self-inVolved to make a Good Gangster without a Sociopathic Partner like Caleb’s Dad has in Caleb.

Megalomaniac is a Despot who is Imaginative to the Point of Xplosive like Hap’E Crimson, Caleb McEwan’s Courtesan, who is the Craziest Character of them All!

Despotic Personality Types are as Dangerous to Regular Folk as they are unSelf-Aware and Sxually-repressed, which causes them to Self-destruct, Often taking Casualties with them. A Despotic Personality attempts Celibacy will become a Child Molester. The Only People who should be Celibate are Ascetics, who are not Despots: Despots crave Power over Others and are Alphas. Ascetics crave Control over themSelves and are Priests.

Hap’e Crimson is a Rare Female Megalomaniacal Despot ( Sociopathic Females tend to either stick to the Licit Market where they are Less Likely to get hurt for being Women &/ marry a Sociopathic Male and manipulate him for Power. Psychopathic Females get killed or go to Jail. Narcissistic Females get Well-Married. Megalomaniacal Females get plowed by EveryOne in the World - if they are born into Strictly Patriarchal Cultures, where Female Promiscuity is frowned upon and Prostitutes are mistreated, Megalomaniacal Females die Young; hence Hap’E Crimson Rare Surviving Female Megalomaniacal Despot is Canadian and has to Loudly assert her Lack of Fear in killing People who hurt Women ), and to the Degree she is an outSider even among Other Despots she is Priestley. She is a Witch Doctor and Much Less Overly Despotic than her Male Counterparts on Account of her submissive Feminine Sx eNergy. Though she is Cleverer than them, Hap’E Crimson lets Caleb McEwan and his Dad push her around and be her Managers, knowing she is a Woman made of Soft Rubber and they are Men made of Hard Glue.

Mike Mitchell of VICE is a Megalomaniacal Despot like Hap’E Crimson Only a Man and therefore he and I are convinced we are the Same Person split across Genders, Generations and the Continent, which may or may not be True, but when Two Imaginative Megalomaniacal Personalities become inTimate, these Imaginative Megalomaniacal Personalities conflate One anOther’s and convince themSelves of Such Absurdities - they also believe they are the King and Queen of Canada, Witch is Lunacy AHAHAHA. Best Thing a Despotic Personality can be is Self-Aware, Otherwise the Despot is unAble to step back from their Intense Personal Despotic Projections and will behave Schizophrenically.

INTERCEPTION: Canadian rEvolution in Style - Skookumchuck inDependence Movement

So what happens in the Canadian rEvolution, how Canada transforms from a Conservative/Liberal/Socialist Democracy under the Order of the British Crown into an Utopian Anarkist Benevolent Dictatorship ( I say Dictatorship because VOTE or DONT a Rotating Front Door has nothing on a Marriage ) under its Own Crown is that by Chance(?) in the North a Whole Family of Despotic Males - the First of whom is a Narcissistic Latent Despot, the Second of whom is a Narcissistic Political Despot, and the Third of whom is a Sociopathic Criminal Despot - grew up Nxt Door to a Rare Female Megalomaniacal Artistic Despot and together they unConsciously hatched a Plot to take over the Hell’s Angels Motorcycle Club which had Effectively monopolized the Country’s Criminal underBelly. Then have the Female Megalomaniacal Despot marry a Physically Large Male Despot who grew up on the Other Side of the Country whose Reciprocal Megalomaniacal Power Complx will inflate hers and BAM BAM LLWAM that’s a VICE Canadian Royal Family Fun Party puts US on the Map, eh. None of this would have been Possible were it not for the Female Despot. If it weren’t for the Female Despot a Lot of People would have to have been killed Stupidly to put Caleb McEwan on Top of the Hell’s Angels and then the McEwans would have had to marry the Most Presentable of the Lot - Brian McEwan, Narcissistic Policial Despot - to a Woman with Political Connections or Ambitions in the East of the Country ( like Lana PopStar with the Jackie-O Fantasy raised NY State ) Most Likely would have led to their eMpire crumbling Limply following that Marriage if they even got that Far which they Probably wouldn't have seeing as I'm the Brains and Much of the Brawn.

What is happening in Canada with the Rise of the LLWAM/VICE Benevolent Anarkistic Dictatorial Media Monarchy is the Rise of an Aristocratic Class in a Very Young Colonial Nation whose Close ties to Britain, Small Population, and Democratic Socialist iNstitutions prevented a Regional Aristocratic Class arising Earlier. What happened before the American rEvolution of 1765 was a Huge Flooding of Europeans into the Lower Half of Turtle isLand allowed for the Fermentation of rEvolutionary Independent Ideas, a Violent Breakaway from Britain and eStablishment of a Corporate reSource Oligarchy 1% under the Guise of Democratic Republicanism, a Political Order we should always be Suspicious of. Canada, because the Population was Smaller and More Disperse and the Terrain was Rougher, sucked off the Teet of the British Crown Much Longer. In 1867 it established what became a Conservative/Liberal/Socialist Democracy still swore Allegiance to the British Crown. There were Wealthy People in Colonial Canada throughout the 20th Century but None with Aristocratic Credibility or the Massive Wealth and interNational Political Pawn Clout of an American reSource 1% Oligarchical Family. Still by the the 21st Century Canada had noThing but the Nouveau Riche at its Peak and was therefore Petty as a Nation State. meanwhile the British Royals, who still Ostensibly had reign over Canada, had been transformed by the Times into Tax-Paid Tabloid Celebrities with Absolutely no Claim to Legitimate Power over the Canadian Nation xcept a Bunch of Drastically outDated Laws, making Vast reSource-Rich Canada the World’s Largest Power Vacuum, followed by Colonial Commonwealth Australia, which is an isLand has a Giant Desert in the Middle nowhere Near World Economic Leader the USA. You see where I am going with this? Anyway. Canada’s Conservative/Liberal/Socialist Democracy during the Late 20th and Early 21st Centuries resembled a Blend of Scandinavian Nanny Socialism and American Ethnic Individualism as Greed Capitalism, which, if you think about it, is a Paradox or Contradiction in Efforts. Nanny Socialism works Well in Scandinavia because the Populations of Scandinavian Countries are Homogenous and maintain an Xtended Cultural Unity - For Many Many Generations Swedes have thought and acted like Swedes and can therefore think and act in Terms of pitching in on a Nanny State that does Relatively Equally by All of them. the USA is an Ethnically Diverse Democratic Republic, which is to say Military Industrial reSource Oligarchy promulgates a Founding inDependent Capitalist ‘American Dream’ allows for a Sense of Cultural Unity despite Ethnic Variety and Corrupt Democracy as Military Totalitarian Cover-up. Canada is a MultiCultural Conservatively Socialist Patchwork in which the People living down the Street from you do not Necessarily share Any of the Same Cultural Values as you xcept the Sort-of Agreement to pitch in on Taxes and not fight. There is no Unifying Canadian National Narrative with the Patriotic Force of the ‘American Dream’ - there’s just post-Colonialism and not standing up to the American Imperialists when they ask us to do Dumb Shit. There is no Xtended Unifying Cultural Ethos tying Citizens together xcecpt shared Regional Geography and a Legacy of Genocide towards the Indigenous. This Lack of Unity or Common Purpose or National Mythology that isn’t Beaver Hats means Residential Schools means go to University and get a Job plundering the Land for the Government who will sell the reSources to the Americans and the Chinese and pocket the Change thanks makes Canada Ideally suited not to Nanny Socialism ( which works Well among Homogenous Populations with Xtended ourStories like the Scandinavian Nations ) or Democratic Republicanism ( which works ‘Well’ in a More or Less Subtly Military Totalitarian Oligarchy like post-rEvolutionary America or post-Soviet Russia ) but to Anarkism - that is Regional, Communal, and inDividual Sovereignty, and Currently the Most Powerful Anarko-Capitalist Organization in Canada is the Hell’s Angels Motorcycle Club runs Canada’s Profitable Black Market. Get the Hell’s Angels on your Side, promise and deliver the Canadian People Regional, Communal and Individual Sovereignty, dream up a Unifying National Narrative with Patriotic Force and you have yourSelf a Wicker Throne, Lana, so of Course we have to steal you Miss from America whom you think you are Devoted to in your Love Songs to prove a Point as here’s the New Rules Canadian Clan of Benevolent Anarkist Utopian Gangster Dictators just want to make Media and grow Organic Veggies and keep our Forests Clean and Healthy and take Drugs at BonFires and have Weird Sx and wear Warm Hats: America has been pushing Canada around too Damn Long and we are not aFraid to steal your New York Doll or your California Biker Deamland away from you, or light your White House Roof on Fire, yet again, but this Time we’ll do it with our Minds. And that’s a Rap, Miss America.

So watch out for Female Megalomaniacal Despots. They are the Kind of People can overthrow a Country with an Erotik Novella about their BoyFriend’s Dad’s Prostate.

The Most Powerful People in a Region are the People having the Most Powerful Sx. Therefore, as the Canadian Queen, or Promiscuous Dominant Woman, I can overthrow the American Government by daring their President to fuck me, and if he can’t do it, oh, that is tooooooooo Bad, who cares to step in for him? That VICE CEO Mike Mitchell, the Canadian King, or the Canadian Man with the Highest Ratio of Physical Size to Mental, Emotional and Social inteLligence, lives and works in NYC means that if we get married and the American President can’t fuck the Canadian Queen Better than the Canadian King does and doesn’t sit down for a Conversation with the Canadian King and Queen where we work SomeThing out to give NYC back to America to demonstrate our Good inTentions, NYC becomes Occupied Canadian Territory HA. I’d open your Borders to Canada and Mexico and get your Army out of the Middle East, America, noBody needs you there xcept Greedy People and Greedy People are Lousy in the Sack. Why don’t you spend the Money you’ll save not blowing up the Arabs on Public Sx Education. Seeing as you win a War with Love and Trust, not Violence and Hate, if you Truly care to win the War, dont send Soldiers - send Sex-Workers.

The More Socially eLevated a Group of People the Less Likely they are to marry for ‘Love’ the More Likely they are to marry for Political inFluence and keep Lovers.

The More Socially eLevated you are the More you will crave Erotik Taboo and the Better Positioned you will be make breaking a Taboo appear eNviable. The Poor and Simple who break Erotik Taboos are Only doing themSelves further disService. So - the Way to elevate your Family, as Mr McEwan has learned, is to Strictly abide by the Rules of Civil Society until you can’t take it Any More and then leap on a Taboo Sxual Relationship when it slaps you in the Face with its Book. Rejecting an eLevating Taboo Relationship when it comes a knocking will result in the Death of One or Both Partners. That is what happened to JFK and Marilyn Monroe and so died the ‘American Dream’ in 1963 Only to get trumped by the ‘Canadian Dream’ in 2014. Marilyn Monroe appeared to reward JFK - Happy Birthday Mr President - but he turned down her Gift. He could have divorced his Wife Jackie, demanded a Right to Plural Marriage, or worked out a Stable Mistress Arrangement with Marilyn, but instead he fucked her and then he shot her down Ooooh. So Marilyn overdosed on Pills and JFK got Mysteriously shot in his Car sitting Nxt to his Wife. Moral of the Story: accept the Gift, Mr President. Lady Life is Lady Death and in the Canadian Dream I kill a Bunch of Men for Prezzies.

Death ( Skeleton Woman ) makes an Appearance in Every Tale of Great Love. People were so Angry at Yoko Ono for being More intereSting to John Lennon than the Beatles, which she was. Fans wanted her gone. So John sacrificed himSelf to a Fan for Yoko and became an Icon for Peace on Earth. People didn’t want Prince Charles to marry the Woman he loved, they wanted him to marry Diana, who was Prettier in a TV Way. That didn’t go Well for Diana who was killed in a Paparazzi Car Crash. People didn’t want Romeo and Juliet to be together so they killed themSelves to try again Somewhere else, maybe as. Caleb McEwan’s Father didn’t want his Son to date a little Whore called Hap’E Crimson. So the little Canadian Girl who was called a Whore unJustly became the interNational Dominatrix specializes in Alpha Males with Death Fetishes and got Caleb McEwan back for the Rest of his Life and his Dad Both the Jerk Faces. Resisting the Death Element in Love will result in it taking you out. Men need Help understanding this because, as we shall recall, Menz Whole Thing is resisting. The Most Erotik Thing a Woman can do is offer to kill a Man out of Love for him, or offer herSelf to be killed by him when the Time is Right but not before. And watch them line up to put it in your Ass even if you don’t want it in there, Girls.

The People who engage in Death Fetishistic Erotik Ceremonies ( either you have it or you don’t ) are the Most Powerful People on Earth no Matter their Material Wealth, which is imMaterial. Right now that means Some Canadian Gangsters with their DIY Media Companies and if you want our Oil China from that Disgusting Fucking Hole in the Alberta you have to bargain with your Life.

The Thing about Power is it is aMaterial and Ironic and therefore the Most Powerful People on Earth are not the Most Materially Lavish but are a Fun Party.

The Prostitute is the Lowliest of Women and so she is also the Highest Order of Woman. Men Only rule the World to the Xtent this Truth is denied by them and so if they are Selfish Fools they will deny the Value of the Prostitute Adamantly in their Asserted Resistance to her. Caleb’s Dad calls little Hap’E Crimson a ‘Whore’ to his Son thinks he’s getting across that she is beneath the Family and Best abandoned. Yeah. Sure she is.

Men are Good at doing Stuff. Not so Good at feeling Things. Men get a Lot done but they don’t feel Much. A Man is looking for the Bright Fire of Feeling, which will scare him at First, when he finds it, and he will run or try to spray it with his Hose, but the Fire will engulf him and he will realize that he is Dead already and this is his Life.

Death Erotika, the Most Powerful Form of Erotika, is not for those who do not crave it. Leave them out of it. Bringing SomeOne into Death Erotika without their Consent will go Very Very Very Badly for you and Many Other People.

Virgins are not Good at Sx. Virgins cry or are Very Soft or burn down your House. Old Men like Virgins because it is like a Poison Spider sucking the Juice out of a Tender Fly it has caught. Want that Nxt Business Deal to go Well? Why don’t you Rape a Virgin and cast her aside let the Lessers fuck her as their Slave Whore for the Rest of her Days ha ha ha More Wine? Wanna make a Good Business Deal? Celebrate after with the World’s Greatest Whore. See what is Considerably Better at the Sx than a Young Virgin is a Cultivated Dominatrix. I consider it my Personal Duty to go around the World convincing Men in Cultures with Virgin Fetishes that Virgins should be left to Other Virgins. The Only Thing redeems Caleb McEwan and Hap’E Crimson’s Backwards Gangster Marriage where he xtorts her is that they started out Kids together and that’s just how Things go SomeTimes not the Kids’ Fault blame the Dad.

The Way that Old Men get Power is they take it from Young Women by Force. The More Power a Man wants in his Life the More he will be drawn to Young Women who can provide it. The Only Way for this Dynamic to be AnyThing Other than Repulsively imBalanced is to recognize that so it is and cut yourSelf the Best Deal you can make under the Circumstances, Girlygoo, which, considering the Sorts of Men you might be dealing with, could be a Preeetty Good Deal. Money, however, is Best left out of a Good Deal with a Powerful Man. Don’t ask for Money. That is my One Single Recommendation when cutting a Deal with an Old Man who wants to have Forceful Sx with you for Power, Ladies. Money is Best left out of it. If you ask for ‘Love’ or ‘Peace on Earth’ Money will be irRelevant. Maybe in a Few Years noOne will even know what I’m talking about when I say ‘Money’ in the Contxt of High-End Prostitution let aLone elsewhere. 

Sx always costs Men. Sometimes it costs them Marriage. Sometimes it costs them Money. Sometimes it costs them their Life.

Money’ is a Short-Hand for Masculine Violence Power. If you ask for it in Return for Sx with an Power Hungry Man that’s like asking for an inJection of Testosterone. It will make you grow a Beard, Ladies. If Some Old Rich Guy is going to pin you down and Ass rape you so he can take over Canada for his Stuck-up Sons you’re Better off asking for Flowers than Money, Ladies. Hm. Which Kind of Flowers I wonder. Thus are Men chastised for their Creepy Fetishes they want to ejaculate on your Ass. They think their Money means soooooooo Much to you - prove them Wrong and you will Never go Hungry again!

Dear Black Market Manly Menz

Men behave like Sperm. They All believe - I will get to the Giant Egg of Glory! Then they got shot in the Head.

On the Black Market, the Karma Dial is set a Notch or Several Higher than on the Licit Market. A Man can spend his Whole Life Nose the Grindstone on the Licit Market and die and have fulfilled his Duty and that was that his Family will mourn and remember him. On the Black Market Every Move you make as a Professional will have a Drastic Reciprocal Response, so, Carefully consider Each.

When you make the Choice to make More Money for you at the Xpense of Others Lives &/ Healths you are risking your Life &/ Health. Life is a Boomerang and if you aren’t watching out for it you’ll get your Head cut off.

The Licit is for Openly sharing with the World. The ilLit is for keeping to yourSelf.

The First Person you kill determines your Rank in the Black Market Hierarchy. Doesn’t matter how Many People you kill after, the First sticks, if you rise up you will fall back down, so when Some Old Fogey tells you to kill a Crack Dealer over what and you’re in the Gang Young Man New to the Game, Carefully consider accepting that Offer. I know the Crack Dealer doesn’t matter.

Men are always undone by their Women. eSpecially when they can’t remember who the Woman is. Caleb McEwan tried so Hard to forget me. He tried so Hard. So I wrote him into a Book that will last a Million Years and that’ll teach him to try and forget me.

Creepy Dudes are All “Bitch was asking for it. Bitch had it coming,” when they hit their Girlfriend or rape a Child or kill a Hooker or insult their Wife. Sure she did. But what were you asking for when you decided to hurt a Woman? Do you know what you have coming? Men: Good at doing Stuff. Like hitting and raping and killing and insulting. Not so Good at feeling Things. Like Generations of suppressed Rage. Suprise! The Greatest outLaw ever was a Woman. They called her the SorrylittleGirl cause that’s how you feel now.

Why iz i so Popular with the Manliest Menz and Dudeliest Dudes? Lean in. It’s cause - I’m a Feminist Philosopher.

It helps to remember that EveryOne was a Baby Once. like if you’re thinking about killing SomeOne cause SomeTimes that’s what it takes it helps to remember this Person was a Baby Once before you decide it is their Time to die because they had it coming.

EveryOne has a Soul Animal. Figure out what a Person’s Soul Animal is and you will be able to predict how this Person will behave in a Given Situation. Now that you know the Animals are our Souls ( and we are their Dreams ) how do you feel about deForestation and Tar Sands? Like you’re having a Bad Dream?

Weapons are Symbolic. If you Really want to hurt SomeOne, sing a Sad Song about how they hurt you and they will feel it like you felt it.

Bois: acting Tough doesn’t make you Tough. Acting Tough makes you Violent. Acting eMpathicly makes you Really Tough. eMpathy is how a Woman is able to take over the Hell's Angels.

When in Doubt! - Love! and Trust. You will find your Jams greased.

Fetishistic Erotik Desires are Symbolic Representations of Emotional Conditions from Material Situations. Caleb’s Rich Dad fantasized about raping a Teenage Girl up the Ass because he spent his Days at Work pushing the little People around for his Glory and thinking he deserved to and More Money. Then I became Real and what did he do to deserve it?

The More Powerful a Man the Moreso he will crave to associate himSelf with Sxually Promiscuous Women. In Cultures where Women are Strictly forbidden from Promiscuity, this makes Men of Power in those Cultures Hypocrites and Deceitful and Corrupt and Murderous and Weak. Canada topples America and becomes the Greatest Place in the World because Feminism. like HA HA HA HA SxE Witches. The CIA did not even see that coming. America was All “Al Queda! - They smashed our Twin Phallic Symbols!” Nope. That was Marilyn Monroe and Hap’E Crimson, Lady Cougars.  Now NYC is in Canada and have you learned your Lesson about breaking the Heart of a Powerfully Sxual Woman you thought you had the Right to fuck but didn’t have the Decency to stand by afterwards? Witch is to say: it is Sad that Innocent People died on 911 but America did that to itSelf being a Patriarchal Jerk and no Amount of Dead Arabs will set it Right. If America wants to avoid ‘Terrorist’ Attacks in the Future weaken it to the Point Canada can steal its Leading City with a Well-Placed Novella, America should try Open Marriages and Respect for Feminist Power travels through Time and speaks to the Dead.

Most People do not want to and should not break Erotik Taboos because doing so is Dangerous to More than just your Reputation. Most People want to and should xperience Love and Familiarity. But Most People want to hear about Taboos being broken and will Greatly admire AnyOne who can pull off breaking a Taboo with Style. So, you Ladies want to find yourSelves among Men of Power, instead of focusing so Much on your Fashion Clothes, might I suggest figuring out how to break Erotik Taboos Stylishly cause if you can do that your Fashion Clothes are irRelevant - it is the Paper Bag Princess gets a Dragon by her Side.

A Corrupt Pimp is in the Business to make a Buck off Working Girls. An Ethikal Pimp is there to have Girls’ Backs. If you’re a Prostitute or a Mistress and John hassles you have to be able to go to a Dangerous Man to have the Score settled. That is what Pimps do. They keep Johns in Line and for that they deserve a Cut.

Women working for Gangs as Prostitutes are not Gangsters. They are Civil Citizens and ought to be protected by State Laws as Such. their Work requires they have Relationships to Gangsters, however, to protect themSelves from Civil Johns who behave in a Manner that is unCivil. You can’t rely on a Restricted State Police Force and Cumbersome Objectivist Legal System to settle a Score with an Abusive John who just needs a Hard Punch in the Face or a Shot to the kNee to get the Message. To Properly settle a Score with an Abusive John you must rely on Vigilante Justice, and for Vigilante Justice the Mobsters xist.

Gangsters, outLaws, or Mobsters xist to ensure the State does not have a Monopoly on Violence. State Police xist to protect Civil Citizens from Each Other and from the Mobsters, who do not obey Civil State Laws and police themSelves. Armies xist to settle Scores between Nations. When you use your Army to steal anOther Country’s reSources, you’re an Asshole, and your Come-upens will get you like what happened to America who was Greedy being taken under and broken back into Turtle isLand by Canadian Anarkists.

Let’s say, because no Data xists, 1-10% of a Population are outLaws, and 95-99% of these outLaws are Men. 99-90% of a Population are Civil Citizen. 10-20% of Civil Citizens like to mingle with outLaws - Attorneys, Spouses, Prostitutes, Clients, etc, but should be considered Civil Citizens by Law eNforcement. To be an outLaw you have to be admitted to an outLaw Gang. To join an outLaw Gang you Pretty Much have to kill SomeOne on behalf of the Gang. Question is who? Better Question is why? It counts to kill yourSelf. It counts to be Part of the Hunting Party eSpecially if you’re the Leader.

The Duty of State Police is to protect Civil Citizens. To this Aim State Police ought to be Objective. Say a Young Man turns up Dead and Police inveStigations reveal he was involved with a Gang as a Drug Dealer, but had not received his Gang Colors. In that Case it is Police Duty to find out who killed him and avenge that Death according to State Laws. If State Police fail to Adequately avenge the Death, the Family may in that Case turn to Mobsters to avenge the Death, or Mobsters might have already taken Care of it. But say a Man turns up Dead who had been initiated into a Gang, had been given Gang Colors. Police should not investigate his Death as it is None of their Business. Take that into Consideration when you contemplate joining an outLaw Gang.

When you join an outLaw Gang you secede the Right to Civilian State Police Assistance in Favour of outLaw Gang Support. If you join a Gang but want to leave you ought to have the Right, depending on how Honorable the Gang finds your inTentions in leaving. If it’s to run from misDeeds go fuck yourSelf the Gang will dispatch Justice. If it’s because you’ve had enough of Gang Life and want to focus on Family and a New Job, so be it - deal with your Tattoos, turn in your Colors, and return to the Fold of the State.

Spouses and Children of Gangster are not Gangsters, they are Civil Citizens and should be protected by Police as Such. Just because you are a Gangster does not mean your Kid will grow up to be a Gangster. The Game is not for EveryOne and forcing SomeOne into it is Cruel and will come back at you.

If I am to be Queen Bitche of Hell’s Angels: if Any Woman feels she has been unJustly treated by a Member of the Hell’s Angels, she may come to me, and I will listen, and I will see to it that this Man is aDequately punished. Do not come to me for Petty Reasons, but being bullied by a Man is not Petty, it is Serious, and Men should not do that to Women.

The Only Circumstance under which it is Acceptable to make a Rape Joke is when you joke about your Own Xperience of being raped so to laugh as not to cry. AnyOne who makes a Joke about SomeOne being raped or about raping SomeOne deserves to get hurt.

The Black Market sells 3 Things: Sx, Drugs, and Anarky. The First Two are Self-eVident. The Last not so Much.

Whatever the State fails to provide the People but which they feel the Need for to live their Lives in a Way that is nurturing to them will wind up on the Black Market. Sx and Drugs are the Only Two Goods remain Consistently on the Black Market. Other Goods wind up on the Black Market because the State is denying Citizens these Goods.

Theft is Acceptable when there is an unJust imBalance of Wealth in a Population. When a Minority Community is being denied Sufficient reSources to survive to inOrdinately benefit a Majority Community and Members of this Minority Community steal from Members of the Majority Community that is Only Just, and this is called the Robin Hood Effect: Xample Young Blacks Car-jacking Rich White Yuppies to buy Sneakers advertised on TV by Rich White Yuppies. When a Majority Community is being denied Sufficient reSources to survive by a Minority Community then there is Looting and a rEvolution. This is the Anarkic Justice of Theft.

Xtortion is Acceptable when it is Consensual, like in the Case of Consensual Prostitutes and Pimps, or a Business agrees to pay a Gang rather than xpect Police to or hire a Civilian Security Firm to protect their Business. It is Never Consensual when you go into SomeOne’s Business and threaten to beat them up if they don’t pay Security Fees to you and if you do that you deserve to go to Jail and I will not protect you. Same if you beat up your Prostitutes to get Money from them. They should report you to the Police. Prostitutes should be kicking Money to Pimps out of Respect.

While because Drugs belong on the Black Market ( and by 'Drugs' I means Drugs that are Fun as opposed to those that are Merely Useful ) but are Very Profitable, the Civilian State is in a Bind. The Civilian State can classify Some Drugs as ‘Legal’ ( Such as Alcohol, Tobacco, or Marijuana ) and sell these and tax them while classifying Other Drugs as ‘ilLegal’ ( Such as Cocaine, MDMA and Heroin ) and leave them to the Black Market, but drawing a Rigid Distinction between ‘Legal’ and ‘ilLegal’ Drugs requires those caught selling ‘ilLegal’ Drugs on the Black Market be punished inOrdinately, which causes those selling ‘ilLegal’ Drugs on the Black Market to be Duplicitous, which causes ‘ilLegal’ Drugs to be tampered with either by being Chemically-altered to be smuggled or in Order to inflate the Supply and make More Profits given no One in the State is enForcing Quality Control on the Black Market while they pretend Drugs are ‘ilLegal’ and so the $ rules. The Poor Quality of ‘ilLegal’ Drugs that is the outCome of Lack of Quality Control via the State on the Black Market means ‘ilLegal’ Drugs are More Dangerous to Civil Citizens who take them which means the State’s Medical and Other Related Xpenses go up while yet the State does not benefit from inCreased Profits Black Market Dealers make on Diluted Drugs which gives the Black Market the up on the Licit Market and thus the State can be toppled by Gangsters. If All Drugs were legalized and taxed by the State the State could enforce Quality Control and Better pay for Medical Costs that are the outCome of Drug Use Such as Addiction Treatment Centers and Public Drug-Education Programs and Full Legalization and Subsequent Taxation of Drugs is a Decent System from that Perspective. However, I believe Drugs belong on the Black Market, and don’t believe AnyThing should be taxed, Certainly not the Black Market, as this would impede its Efficiency and remove from its Purpose ( to be Secretive ). So. Perhaps a Better System is to have Open Intimacy between those heading State Government and those running the Black Market, as in the Case of Brothers Caleb McEwan the outLaw Gangster and Brian McEwan the Civilian Politician. Because the Guy at the Top of the Gangster Pyramid is Brother to the Guy at the Top of the Civilian Pyramid when the Guy at the Top of the Civilian Pyramid says “Dear Civil Citizens: Alcohol, Tobacco, and Marijuana are Legal, will be Available in Stores, will be taxed, and this Tax Money used to pay for Drug Addiction Treatment Facilities and Education Programs until we think up SomeThing Better than Taxes, and trust me, we are on it. Drugs besides these 3 are ‘ilLegal’ and will Only be Available on the Black Market or as Part of Certified Therapy Programs. However the Guy distributing ‘ilLegal’ Drugs on the Black Market is my Brother, so if there are Any Problems with the Quality of your ilLegal Black Market Drugs, Citizens of Canada, I consider that a Slight on the Honor of my Family, and I will attend to it Personally, which is how Things are done on the Black Market: Personally. AnyOne caught smuggling or selling ilLegal Drugs Ostentatiously will have to pay a Fine to the State and this Fine will go towards Addiction Treatment and Education Programs. AnyOne caught selling Drugs to Children will go to Jail. AnyOne caught tampering with Drugs to reduce their Quality will go to Jail.” Thus is the Quality of ‘ilLegal’ Black Market Drugs ensured to State Citizens while at the Same Time their Fear that Hard Drugs will proliferate and Hard Drug Use is being encouraged by the State if say All Drugs are ‘Legally’-Available in Stores is waylaid. Civilians working the Licit Market need to understand that the Relationship between Licit and ilLicit, White and Black Markets, is Symbiotic, or, Brotherly. Under a Symbiotic Black/White Market outLaw/State System, ‘ilLegal’ Drugs to be sold on the Black Market are smuggled into a Country via Gangster Black Market Routes, however, no Effort is made by Police to prevent or intercept this Smuggling or to inCarcerate those who traffic in ‘ilLegal’ Drugs. If a Batch of ‘ilLegal’ Drugs is found to have been tampered with or sold to Children, State Police investigate who is Responsible and State Courts punish those Responsible Appropriately and I will not protect them.  

If you are a Member of a Reputable Gang, do not sell Drugs to People under the Age of Eighteen, and do not employ People under the Age of Eighteen as Drug-Runners or Drug-Dealers. If a Person who is under the Age of Eighteen wishes to try ‘ilLegal’ Drugs they should have to get these Drugs from a Member of their Family. I used MDMA at 16 and I believe my Xperiences with this Drug were Xpansive, however if my Child wishes to use MDMA at the Age of 16, I want them to get it from my Hand and use it under Conditions over which I have Some Jurisdiction.  

Drug Use is Cool. Drug Addiction is unFortunate. One of the Biggest Risks and Moral Quagmires involved in being a Drug Dealer is handling Addicts. At what point do you refuse to sell to an Addict? ( Money is as Addictive as Any Drug. ) What is your Responsibility as a Purveyor of Drugs towards SomeOne who appears intent on heading down the Wrong Path? I say if you sell Dangerous Drugs it makes Sense to have a Clearly eStablished Cut-off Limit and if SomeOne tries too Hard to buy after the Cut-off Limit have them Physically harmed - beaten up, shot in the Foot, etc, call it the Lesser of Evils. But don’t kill the Person. If you kill the Person that’s on you.

Death and Taxes, if Both are to be ineVitable, until we think of SomeThing Better: Most Successful Gangsters run Licit as Well as ilLicit Businesses. Gangster Licit Businesses should be taxed the Same as Any Licit Businesses and Gangsters should report on their State Taxes their Licit Business Revenues. Black Market Revenues should be left out of it: the Tax on that Money is the Risk involved in making it and the Money paid to launder it etc. I would advise against concealing Licit Assets to avoid Taxation, however, or the Licit Business Practice of parking Money in offShore Banks to avoid Taxation, as treating yourSelf like the Xception, for Some Reason, is Bad Karma. As Long as there is Money and a State, which One Day there might not be, and this Paragraph will be Oddly Arcane, if you want to avoid Taxation, you should be earning Money on the Black Market, but the Black Market Only sells 3 Things: Sx, Drugs, and Anarky. I think Taxes should be a Community Decision, rather than a Federal Decision, and that Taxation should be consented to with the Decision to settle in a Particular Community or Region and work there for Money, rather than Taxation being imposed on Citizens Simply for their having been born in a State as this is a Form of enSlavement to the State which should be working for the People, not having the People work for it. 

How to initiate Voluntary Municipal Taxing via Government Facebook

Under an Imagined System of Limited Government 6 Career-Spheres are Tax-Paid and therefore Cost the Population Only their Taxes: 1) Health Care; 2) Education; 3) Police, Soldiers and ourStorical, eNvironmental, Legal, etc ‘Preservation’-workers; 4) Postal Work and Shipping Regulation; 5) Committees whose Job it is to determine Year by Year who is and is not considered among these 6 Career Spheres and therefore should or should not receive a Government PayCheck; 6) Revenue Agents and Accountants who handle Tax Collection and Distribution on Behalf of the Government. I think Politicians should have Other Sources of Revenue than Government Taxes: they should rely on Donations, or be inDependely Wealthy, and offer their Political Skills for Free in Return for the Power they receive from the People as Politicians ( a ‘Career Politician’ paid by the Government ought to be Suspect of Corruption ). All those Working for the Government - eSpecially Revenue Agents and Accountants who handle Taxes - should be policed for Any Sign of eMbezzlement. Hopefully employing a Streamlined System Such as this would reduce Taxes, relieve a Cumbersome Bureaucracy, and prevent eMbezzlement by Individual Government Workers and Politicians; it remains to be seen.

I think Municipal Communities should have a Choice whether or not Citizens of those Municipal Communities pay Taxes to the Government at a Rate to be haggled with the Government on a Community by Community Basis. If a Community does not pay Taxes to the Government that Community will not receive Tax-Paid Health-Care Professionals, Educators, Police, Preservationists, Postal-Workers or Shipping Regulators and will have to furnish and pay these Individuals themSelves should they desire their Services, so Each Community can chose what works Best for it: to pay Taxes and receive Government-approved&paid Professionals or not pay Taxes and Privately furnish and pay Professionals ( who may not have Government Credentials but may be Perfectly Competent ), or pay a Percentage of a Tax-Rate and receive Some Sorts of Professionals but not Others. To move to a Community an Individual must consent to that Community’s Taxation-on-inCome Percentage, or join the Community Committee to argue for a New Taxation Rate. So in Some Towns you would get to keep All the Money you earn and pay Less for Goods and Services within that Town, but have to pay for Medical Xpenses or Schools Directly to the Medical Professionals and Schools, and in Others you would pay an eLevated Tax-Rate on Goods and Services bought in the Town and your inCome as a Resident of that Town but not have to pay Medical Xpenses and Schools Directly to the Medical Professionals and Schools, still we would All be One Country. Under a System in which Taxation is Voluntary and based on where you Physically live, say you live outside of a Municipal Jurisdiction, in an Area with no Community-set Tax Rate, and have decided not pay Taxes, you can still go into Town and use the Services paid for by Townspeople’s Taxes, but if they learned you don’t pay Taxes, they might refuse to serve you or give you Lesser Service unless you xplain to them that you are Simply Poor and in Need of Help, Help which if they refuse to give it to you unless you pay Taxes you can’t afford, that is not the Community for you, move on, and Otherwise, you could sign up to pay Taxes as an Individual Living outside a Community Jurisdiction at a Percentage that works for your inCome.

In an Anarkik unState, the Community and its Committees are Sovereign Authorities, even if they pay Taxes to an Xtended State they chose to do or not to do so. Communities set Laws, which can differ Vastly Community to Community, and can be haggled. Under an Anarkik System of Limited Government in which Government handles 4 Things: Health Care, Education, Defence, and Mail, and All its Taxes go to those 4 Things, Regional Sustainability is a Priority of Community Organization: Communities must be able to feed themSelves and supply Consumer Goods and Services without the Help of Government xcept to regulate and police Shipping to deter Fraud, Theft and Tampering ( so if you suffer Any of these inJustices in a Private Trade, go to the Government for Justice. If the Government fails to deliver Justice, go to Mobsters for Justice, just remember - an Account opened with ‘our Thing’ can Never be closed - you might be Better off continuing to hassle the Government, whose Job is to behave Objectively towards you, to deliver Justice, than to open an Account with Mobsters ). Communities that specialize in Certain Types of Businesses or Goods or Services can trade these with Other Communities that specialize in Other Types of Businesses or Goods or Services, or for Credit within Other Communities, thus ensuring Symbiotic Localized Sustainability, Dynamic Trade Relationships unencumbered by Government or Money if neither is desired.

All Goods and Services produced by a Community or Business ought to be considered the Sovereign Property of that Community or Business, and Ownership of a Business ought to be Proportional to the Amount of Work done for that Business, the Difficulty of the Work, and the Amount of Education needed to perform the Work. The Educated Worker who toils 8 Hours a Day for a Business ought to Own More of the Wealth produced by that Business than a Manager who spends 2 Hours a Day managing that Business even if the Manager is considered the Worker’s Superior in the Work-Space. Hopefully, this System will prevent the Widespread Xploitation of eMployed Peoples by Managerial ‘Owners of the Means of Production’ under Capitalism: instead of being paid per Hour, an eMployee owns a Percentage of the Business Proportional to the Amount of Time in their Day/Month/Year they spend working for that Business x the Difficulty of their Job at the Business x the Amount of Education they had/have to receive to perform the Job / the Total Number of eMployees. Thus the Person with the Most Power at an Organization is not Necessarily the One making the Most Money at it, so Much as the Person who has dedicated the Most of their Time and Education to the Job, and you can Only work so Many Hours.

3 Kinds of Facebook Account

1) Citizen – real name – real info – use Citizen Account to view and vote, on a daily basis, on every topical municipal, provincial, federal and international issue, generating data for use in municipal, provincial, federal and international decision-making and giving Facebook greater depth and relevance. Registered citizens of municipalities within provinces within countries within the global community receive queries on their Facebook feeds take seconds to complete whose results can be monitored on the relevant official government Facebook pages, making for highly efficient and specifically-tailored sovereign local governments that are still connected to larger cultural and bureaucratic entities. Design algorithm so it’s impossible to know who voted what way, only how many people voted in a particular way at what time ( you can do that right Facebook? ). For citizens who do not want to sign up for Facebook to use the daily citizen voting mechanism they can still provide self-identification as they would for any government vote and use computers set up at government locations to vote on issues of concern to them.

2) Persona – stage name – real or fabricated info – Persona Accounts can be used to connect with friends and to self-promote but cannot be used to vote on citizen issues.

3) Business – real business ventures and advertizing – Facebook as Farmville – use Facebook to connect business trading partners locally, provincially, federally and internationally to barter goods directly as in the Farmville online video-game: X strawberries for X bananas. Businesses that cheat, lie or do not deliver can be flagged. Businesses with good customer relations will thrive.

 Writing Laws for Dummies: fuck a Judge and a President and absorb their Powers!

Sx. Every Time you have Sx you are engaged in a Black Market Transaction in which whatever you put in you will get out the Other End. If you put in Kindness you will get Kindness. If you put in Hate you will get Hate. If you put in Money you will get Money. If you put in Love you will get Love. SomeTimes it takes a While though, for what you put in to come out the Other End. I put a Lot of Love into Caleb McEwan who was Cruel to me and gave of mySelf to People who didn’t have Room enough for even that little Bit of the Great Ocean of Love in my Soul and now I am writing this Book waiting for the Waves of Love that have pulled back from the Shore to crash down on me.

Anarky or Vigilante Justice. Be Careful, Dispatcher of Vigilante Justice, that the Violence you administer is Appropriate to the Crime. If you overxtend your Reach you will hit yourSelf. If you as Leader set Rules punishable by Violent Force that are Petty &/ imPossible to stick to, thus requiring an Xcessively Violent Punishment to be enforced as Laws, you will Surely be overthrown as Leader and made to look the Fool.

When you kill SomeOne you absorb their eNergy and All the Feelings their Family has about them being killed. So be Careful whose eNergy you absorb and think how their Family would feel because that Shit will stick to you and it does not wash off with the Blood.

The State ought to behave Objectively in Service of Citizen Needs. It ought to do Studies that demonstrate Results and then take Action and measure the Effects of that Action for further Studies for Later Actions. Gangster outLaws behave Personally. They do whatever they feel like doing and whatever Feelings they act on will come back at them. Don’t worry about Gangsters facing Justice for their Crimes. They always do.

Rivals are a Condition of Success. As Long as you are Successful, SomeOne will try to make a Living hating on you. A Smart Leader can tell the Difference between a Rival who should be admired and loved as a Rival and a Rival who ought to be ignored as a Rival.

A Gangster becomes Boss either by starting his Own Gang or by working his Way up the Pyramid of a preXisting Gang by showing Skills and Deference to Hierarchy Bosses. Gangsters are brought down by Greed and Jealousy and their Consequence: Rape. Male Gangsters are Most Often though they may not connect the Dots brought down by Vengeful Women whose Power is MetaPhysical. A Woman can move across the World from you Never speak a Word of you to AnyOne and still kill you with her Rage. When a Gangster gets Sxually Greedy and forces himSelf on Women he takes too Much Loot at the Xpense of his Gang this Activity sews discord in the Gang and the Gangster is deposed Usually by an Assertive Younger Buck who, because he is a Sneaky Traitor ( Sxually Deceitful ), is Swiftly taken out in the Same Manner. If you wish to summarize a Gangster’s Career look at how he behaves around Women. If he is Greedy and Violent with Women his Gang is Greedy and Violent. If he yearns for Love despite his Failings or his Woman sticks by him he will be redeemed in Collective Lore. If he lies to his Woman about his Profession Cops nab him on Some Legal Trifle Usually Taxes. If he finds Love gets Married cheats on his Wife with Secret Prostitutes during his Gang Heyday decides that Family is the Answer in Late Middle Age he gets to retire. If he falls for a Slut but demands she be Monogamous to him his Career will fall apart eMbarassingly. If he dates Many Much Younger Women he will appear to become Past his Prime and Foolish. If his Woman kills him and EveryOne knows it the Woman she takes his Place ( Griselda Blanco Notably killed a Husband at Close Range ).  Dear Men: how you treat Women is how Life treats you.

There was noThing Special about Daisy Buchanan and Jay Gatsby didn’t want her for Any Reason besides her Father’s Legitimate Riches. Gangster Gatsby’s Desire for Debutante Daisy was a Reflection of his Lust for Material Wealth and Social Approval, and so because Black Market Gatsby’s Love for Licit Market Daisy was eMpty like those Lavish Parties he threw to Hopefully meet her - wasn’t about her as an inDividual Woman suited to him as a Gangster Male but about her Voice sounded like Legal Money - she wouldn’t leave her Licit Market Rich Husband, Tom Buchanan, who is her Reciprocal Mate, for the Gangster. Tom, meanwhile Gatsby is lusting after Daisy who would Only bore him if he ever got her to himSelf ( look even her Legal-Market Husband gets bored of her! ), is carrying on an Affair with a Sumptuous Working-Class Woman, Myrtle. ie: you may think a Daisy ( Lots of Legitimate Material Wealth and Social Prestige ) would satisfy you, but you’ll find Once you get her you start to crave SomeThing Rough and unPolished ( and this is why I, the World's Greatest Whore, am DIY Punk ). Myrtle Probably belonged with Gatsby and that’s why she and he wound up Dead at the End of The Great Gatsby - Myrtle run over by Daisy driving Gatsby’s Car; Gatsby by Myrtle’s Husband thinking Gatsby’s was the One was having the Affair with Myrtle having the Motive to run her over in his Car. Licit Tom and Daisy Buchanan get away with EveryThing and their Money and remain Married. Moral of the Great American Novella: when Gangsters chose the Wrong Lovers for the Wrong Reasons they kill Each Other.

Moral of the Great Canadian Novella: even when a Family of Gangsters chose the Right Lovers for the Right Reasons they still kill Each Other but More Poetically-so

Life is not Logikal. Life is Emotional. There is a Logik to the Emotions.

Thing about my letters is I don’t have to send them and you don’t have to read them for them to speak to you.  It’s I wrote the letters matters. I think of someone who can help me, I write a letter to them, maybe I send the letter, maybe I don’t, usually I put it on my blog, either way I rarely/never get a written reply because what I write doesn’t ‘make sense’ which hahahahahaha sure it doesnt, but in writing the letter I get an unconscious telepathic signal off of the person I’m writing to so that even if you ignore me by the third or fourth letter I’ve written to you have not read or understood I get your motivations better than you catch me whose letters you haven’t the time or intelligence or personal or professional humility to interpret.  Who writes letters to celebrities? Nobodies. Fans. Wannabes. Her. And if you put me in jail I will keep writing letters and if you take away the pen I will send signals and if you take away my body I will return. So the world turns. So the heart yearns. So the spirit burns.


Dear Canada, my Home and Native Land

I am a Utopian for Real. As far as I can tell there has never existed a society without outlaws or organized criminals ( outlaws band together for protection, becoming organized criminals ). Therefore trying to eradicate outlaw communities is about as effective and ethical as trying to eradicate other communities of ‘undesirables’ – Indians, Blacks, Gays, Jews, etc ( the result of covert attempts at eradication being ghettoized minority communities run by organized criminals or outright genocide ). I think instead of policing gangsters like it would only be possible to maintain a healthy, functional society ( Utopia ) without them and so anyone who behaves like a gangster ( makes a living on the black-market ) belongs in jail or dead and their means of subsistence ( the sex, drug and vigilante justice trades ) legislated out of contemporary existence ( good luck with that ), it would be more effective and practical to enforce an honor code among thieves.

To test this hypothesis of mine – violence and amorality on the black-market can be curbed by creating and enforcing a set of anarchistic “laws” apply specifically to the black-market ( by contrast to a set of civilian laws aim to discourage people from working the black-market and punish them if they are caught, leaving the black-market itself a social blind-spot of shysters, murders, liars, and unfairly criminalized civilians and small-timers ) – I have decided to become a violent gangster pirate queen with a clearly articulated moral spine and we shall see if fear of me yields better results in terms of reducing immoral theft ( there is such a thing as moral theft, which is theft of the fat rich to feed the starving poor ), drug-addiction, sexual-exploitation, wanton murder, and other diseases of the underworld, than fear of the cumbersome, hypocritical, didactic civilian police judges who, quite frankly and it should be more obvious to more people why, conjure little respect among outlaws comparatively to their fellow outlaws.

Please do not mount your high-horses on my account, civil Canada. I find the mainstream lifestyle you have to offer me – school, a job, obedience or at least the superficial appearance of obedience to hypocritical dehumanizing mean laws
don’t make sense beyond parliamentary abstraction imposed by a faceless bureaucratic authority machine – intolerably dull, not to mention corrosively dishonest and paranoid.

Let me be who I wish to be and we shall see who is right about justice in an Utopian society – Nanny State believes ‘taking the law into your own hands’ is showing an unacceptable level of personal responsibility ( if you have a problem with that Judge-Dad Neighbor Andrea you should go to the police, or, better yet, for the sake of everyone’s reputation, if he has not actually raped you or you cant prove he raped you beyond reasonable doubt - how, friends, can I prove beyond a reasonable doubt the Judge Dad is a rapist without letting him rape me in front of you? - ignore or suppress with medications the heavy ‘I am going to rape you repeatedly kept-woman’-psychicvibes emanating from him in vivid waves ) or me, the kept-woman with time on her hands between rapings! believes I can do a better job keeping organized crime under control by being an organized criminal boss than Canadian Nanny State by vilifying and incarcerating me for being an organized criminal boss. Why sell sex, drugs and anarchy answer the call of the wild when you could be a sober, monogamous middle-class police judge who works for the government like Daddy over there hmmmmm I wonder Canada is it really going to take a raver girl getting raped by a judge and her deciding to join a biker gang to get back at him for you to figure out how very ineffective are your anti-sex&drug&death-salesmanship laws? It probably will in which case - it is worth it?   
A: No. hell to take orders from me. I mean his mom. I mean me dressed as his mom. I mean - political power & fetish sex what is the difference? I need to know for my online hookerz artskool final project where I take over a big flimsy country with a powerful vagina's imagination. 
stop picturing politicians when you masturbate Sauron you'll destory democracy! Oops

in Canada Today: Electoral Democracy railroaded by Obvious

Loony Queen Bitche rulez ici

3 Decrees of the New Canadian Queen @FunParty


- Crown Land ceded to appropriate Aboriginal Bands

- Important Places to have French, English and Aboriginal Names ex: with First Nations approval rename ‘North America’ Turtle Island, ‘British Columbia’ Skookumchuck, ‘Vancouver Island’ Kuosingelas, ‘Victoria’ Camas City, and ‘Vancouver’ Salish City or Musqueam City.  

- Develop First Nations Culture and Language Programs for Canadian Schools

- Address Systemic Poverty on Reserves

-British Crowns, Union Jacks, etc on Official Canadian Flags, Crests, etc to be replaced by First Nations Art


- Create Jobs! by hiring people to transform any and all available spaces into communal food gardens under municipal jurisdiction

- Provide Home and Business-owners with information packets detailing how to transform front and back lawns, roofs, balconies, etc into family food gardens. Include these books – 

Image: front cover


-FrECotopia = Free Ecosystem Cooperation Utopia

- Ease Canadian Municipalities into Anarchistic Sovereignty ( or FrECotopias ) by allowing each municipality to write drafts of and vote on their own legal codes in anticipation of Facebook: Citizen daily voting services for efficient consensus governing ( some communities may want to keep their laws as is; some communities may want to overhaul some laws; some communities, such as fundamentalist Christian communities, may want a totally different legal system and within reason of mutual tolerance each unique municipal community should all have the right to govern as it sees fit and if you don’t like how your municipal region is governed you can get on the committee or move )

- Design new ‘Volunatry-Tax’ system of gradational municipal taxation corresponding to degree of desired involvement with provincial and federal bureaucracies ( pay no tax receive no services. Pay some tax receive some services. Pay lots of tax receive lots of services etc )

- Design Facebook: Citizen online voting system so every issue of municipal, provincial or federal concern can be voted on for informed decision-making by approved governing committees. 

It’s not that I’m absolutely certain these Ideas are going to work to transform Canada into the First Utopian Anarchist State unState – it’s that I dare to have new and radical Ideas and will test their practicality as best I can.

that Old Queen's a Hasbeen
My Man-Date is Fun for EveryOne!
Skookumchuck Canuck Anarkist Utopian 49th Paralel Northern Nations where we're Free as Canadabe Sovereignty is Individuality & Community is Identity!

I'm doing a poll for my party consensus 
- how fun is it to gossip about men in government humiliating themselves with high-price hookers?
1-10 on the Fun Scale where 1 is meeting Robert Pickton 5 is checking Facebook and 10 is the Best Orgasm
 in otherwords - how appealing is having an affair as a potential means to become a political presence if you're a young woman with no skooling? 
( A on this field trip will open many job oppertunities I mean legs up in the business )

Hello Pam. Remember me? Andrea–Queen of Canada. We met at Grandma’s Pub in Gibsons.

I called ----------- I’m a bit shy and procrastinate about phones but left her a message saying I met you on Halloween and you wanted to meet her and my impressions of you were positive and she’s not running for the Liberals any more and a bit disillusioned but she should still have a voice on behalf of the Sunshine Coast I think she’s a good spokesperson for our values and priorities here which are different than the values and priorities of West Vancouver and ought to be appreciated as such by the federal government – our needs as a rural region cant be sublimated in favor of policies benefit the wealthier West Vancouver population Coasters get tacked onto and can feel overrided by. On one hand must be a difficult riding to represent because of the sharply contrasted neighbors being considered the same electoral block by authority peoples living in far away hallways but on the otherhand it’s an opportunity to come up with a holistic philosophy of governance benefits people in urban areas as well as rural communities - I'm an insidious optimist with a vision and it involves food sustainability! People in the city might have the money-power but you can always undergrow them kind of like Mark Emery said. maybe I should recruit him for a prank ( on him ). I wonder if American jail has humbled him or it'll take me the young woman who would be dismissed or exploited if she came alone to his stoned-wall man-fort with only her curious genius waltzing in with threatening criminal goons and an elaborate cocktail-napkin scheme to take over the country for fun and protect our provincial cash-crop. but how to get me some loyal and useful backup goons is a whole other intricate operation I am only partway through confabulating in my semifictional lalaLotusland.

Nonetheless I wanted to give you some homemade art for Winterfest because you inspire me as a female politician who ( it would seem ) hasnt needed any heavy lurking men to get anywhere ( now that's feminism! ). Surely God was handing me an opportunity to learn something ( about tact ) when sHe introduced us? Do you have an address I could mail a small package to?

Andrea Coates
Founder : Lotusland Warrior Art Media @ Fun Party

Will DO Mr Emery Hear that Half-Baked Vancouver?Liberal. Vote.
my Fellow Criminalized Flower-Children did U NO the Federal Canadian Government still uses Paper Ballots 
wow like those Important Grownups trying to tell me what I can and cant DO with my Brain Garden have never heard of the highspeed internet!
no wonder a 26 YO swiped their Country with a Blog
the Kindergardeners of the Future will sing
God save the Queen
from being tossed in Jail for rollin the Greeeeeeen 
who need Money when you got Silly

Dear Mike Straumietis 
aka Advanced Nutrients

And I quote from Bud Inc, 2005, by Ian Mulgrew, p.107:

“Straumietis was convinced he was part of a revolution that was about to occur with the decriminalization and eventual legalization of marijuana.”


Sure thing there Big Mike. Whatever you want.

But how you think that is going to happen? Like exactly? Bet on Justin Trudeau?

Bustin may get elected and may have marijuana paper-legalized in Canada but how for example are the Hell’s Angles going to react to whatever he fancies and his ‘Liberals’ agree to purportedly keep the big bud trade smooshed under their federal government’s not-so-green thumb? Is Bustin going to have a friendly chatty with the gangsters about taking their business and cutting their profits and shooing them out the country via police on what grounds now marijuana is legal? 

Or is Justin Trudeau a coward who will predictably flounder and upon office find himself taking the advice of a drug-dealing militia drives the underworld in his fine country? 

Or alternatively is Stephen Harper going to call Obama whine to him on the phone for backup cause Pacific Canada has turned to Fun Party Anarkism and is Obama going to be like ‘what fun party? Anarchists? Really? who is leading these anarchists Stephen?’ and Stephen Harper is going to be like ‘they're anarchists Barak!’ in a terrible high-pitch and Obama’s going to be like ‘what does that mean Stephen?’ and Stephen Harper is going to be like ‘um a young woman calling herself The Queen – she has a blog!’ crying on the phone and Obama is going to be confused and incredulous like
‘what woman? blog? is this a joke from a tvmovie?’

A:Yes. Hahahahahahha Yes Woman. Blog. Hahahahaha. Whatta Joke. Yes. HA

 but the next thing President Barak Obama knows Stephen Harper’s been exiled to Northern Alberta 
and an army of bikers and celebrities and hipster kids is at his house smoking weed on his lawn and singing and he finds himself working for Facebook as its WashedupingtonDConsultant.

Did you know Mike, Western Canada of the Big Bud Trade has the world’s most lucrative Hell’s Angles’ clubs? And the current patriarch of the organization – Sonny Barger of California/Arizona – is an old man who is about to die? 

Who is going to take Sonny’s place now and how where will the club go without him?

I’ll bet you a rEvolution Mike – it will be me, Andrea Coates, the Queen of Canada, for the sake of a dramatic turn of events at the end of Part 1 of Hell's Angels, an outLaw Saga. not even my stupid pimp-boyfriend who got me into fucking criminals probably currently works for an honest guy like you Mike confides he has a crazy xgf he needs to be careful about like I’m on someone else’s side. Heads up, cause who sees a woman quite literally coming?


Andrea Coates

But how does one wind up – Canada Girl the Super Hooker? 

not by staying Home getting Stoned and watching TV

I learned I’ll require a collection of 250 people to register @FunParty as a federal political party. 250 people. I know of 250 people but it doesn’t make sense to run about willy-nilly in the Canada Cape recruiting individuals for this elaborate joke I’m cracking when I don’t even have my superhero squad together. I should maybe warn you seeing as I’m trying to make friends: some people say I have ‘delusional personality disorder’. I think I live in a graphic novel I’m writing for fun. You ever go to North Vancouver, Pam? I dunno if that’s miles away in time/space but in North Vancouver there’s the Judge who used to be the Judge in smalltown north where I grew up. Him and his sons are like these white carbon paper copies of tall handsome Canadian Kens with narcissistic power-complexes too stupid and self-absorbed to get it together without me to prod them into purposeful and united action – perfect politicians to front a conniving gangster queen if that’s what you’ve decided to be forever Halloween. I’ve been spying on the youngest son since I was 14 ( I’m 26 now ) there wasn’t much to do in Smithers so snooping on sexy drug-addict neighbor boy’s dark buried secrets provided distraction from otherwise quotidian and isolated existence ( also living heavily in my imagination ) however he used my affection as means to peer-pressure me into an amusement stripper and convenience lay for his street gang. I think boi-o has deep emotional and psychological issues and so I do too. Turns out in irony of ironies which is perfectly fitting cute pudgywudgy younger son I’m desperately in love with is a drug-dealer and pimp fast-tracked to horribly humiliate his father to teach the Judge a karmic lesson about being a tyrannical straightnose which means the Judge of North Vancouver is a fraud of an uptight gentleman waiting to be peer-pressured into publically quitting his day job to organize my Gangsters’ Rights Political Party I invented to save his cute son from jail and stuck-up family from otherwise inevitable disgrace. The Judge’s family doesn’t take me seriously because I have “mental health issues” or maybe a sense of humor about them who do not get what is funny at all while G is an odd evasive bachelor with a persistent stalker since virginity which is supposed to be more likely? than that he’s only sexually-attracted to hookers? Pimps and hoes are real people see, with real families and real qualms about who they are stem from being hypocritically criminalized for providing highly-in-demand but socially-taboo products and services. I mean – why does the teenage rich-boy I like lord over secret drug-induced teen-rave orgy-parties at which I am sample-platter? Unless his immaculate Judge dad is really really very very very repressed under that robe of his explains why he viciously condescends to my mom at his formal dinner party? I figure the kid took up drugs and underage prostitutes to rebel against his dad and now he’s stuck a sadistic sociopathic stimulant-addict pimp with few workable talents outside the sex/drug-trade. He will inevitably wind up with the Hell's Angels.  I could spend my sad moll’s life crying over the phone into his prison cell not knowing if he’s going to get shot in a coverup deal or I could use the super seduction powers he coaxed out of me through tightly controlled ritual neglect and temporary drugged indulgence to legalize drug and sex-trafficking, hand the handsome old embarrassed McJudge thoroughly deserves his come-uppens just-desserts happens to even the most upstanding citizens in society looks the way it does to protect the honorable reputations of Judgers with terribly incriminating and embarrassing fetishes I could go on and on about for pages and pages Pam and do pseudonymously on my blog but I wont here except to say if I can have sympathy for criminals and rapists in spite juries and voters will too.  Now you know my sob story but I’m just one case of a real person’s life swept into a bureaucratic nightmare for plush social carpets almost articulate enough to expose the vast corruption at play here: we the citizens of Canada have built prisons full of those less persuasive in letter and charming in person than I and we are building more prisons to trap confused people whose socioeconomic ecosystems force them to work the lucrative black-market trades in sex, drugs and anarchy ( vigilante justice or gangsterism ) blamed and punished for the crepuscular indulgences of people with titles like ‘Honorable Judge’ or ‘Prime Minister’. What connection does number of incarcerated drug-traffickers have to reduction in drug-consumption by population if not any at all? Who happens to have a tenuous link to the kind of people might be able to change things in this country so drug-dealers don’t have to be pathological con-artists even towards their own family and powerful people who should be able to have grown-up affairs without losing their important jobs can host adult parties rather than secretly rape little girls who will be called storytellers to keep their important jobs so I better do the best I can with the confusing hand I was dealt yeah? I mean here’s a Funny Joke – why did Judge Daddy leave his small town for the Big City? So he could impress on far more richer people than my parents - people like you Pam he wishes to impress with his washed hands and downsized condo - what a flawlessly objective clear-headed long-married tasteful man-of-honor with big-shot potential studly-stud sons he is?  He wasn’t content to invite my parents to a hush-hush swinger party now us kids have left? Clearly not. He’s a lonely old idiot sitting on a high tense podium of reflexive pretention I see under his robe and plan to expose him to everyone humorously even if it costs him his job I’ve got a new better job for him will make far more money and friends. He should open an exclusive nightclub for his friends he wants to make to advance his scruffy sons on their journeys to acquiring preening patriarchal titles like his! And everyone knows I’m the one who open-secretly rules behind their backs because who is putting their neck on the line by confessing to everything here? The whole conspiracy.

We’ll call it the Ganja Goddess @FunParty Headquarters and the Judge can spend the final 3rd of his life being a fashionable and famous cult-leader in his long dark robe as opposed to a stuffy old Judge nobody cares about I mean – did you care about the Judge of North Vancouver before this letter, Pam? Probably not but now you really care. Now he’s like the News in Towncity for years if I release this letter. I’ll leave that up to you. I’ve got other plans. for making the News. I think I’m an entertainer Pam. Are you entertained? If so the Fun Party is doing its only National Responsibility. A betterlooking and more dignified Rob Ford for headlining act. The kind of person you meet at the end of the night after several drinks and maybe it’s a dream. Meanwhile the Judge is not on anyone’s radar because without me decorating his lifestory with my sass he’s neither interesting nor original nor gossipable but with me tooting that horn he’s fascinating and quite unique and will be hot gossip among the sorts of people donate big bucks! How envious have I made every over-the-snowy-mountain financier in Canada whished he too found a golden-hearted teen hooker in his kid’s closet rather than an incarcerated or dead prodigal drug-dealer son nobody cares about the boy either cause we’re to assume it’s a drug-dealer’s fault he’s a criminal? Maybe Bustin has an opinion I dunno but someone needs to stand up for our right to a humane and ethical underworld and it might as well be me I’m good at calling bluffs and writing opinion pieces and the fine powdered line between real-actual political philosophies and made-up cartoon characters.
I turn them into the Country's Leading Editorial Cartoon and yet - do they appreciate me? 
Under-appreciated is the Genius of Andrea Coates the Artist and so the 'McEwans' remain a Quotidian Middleclass Family of Supremely Picky BroJocks no-one has heard of and Wannabe-1stLady Lana Banana sings on in Vain "You're my National Anthem / God you're so Handsome" inspired Lana indeed

Dear Emma Sayle

My name is Andrea Coates aka Mistre$$ LLWAM BAM BAM aka Molly the Moll and I am the World’s Greatest Whore now and again you may dismiss my claim or suspend disbelief long enough to read this letter through though Emma hosting members-only orgiastic parties for wealthy and attractive couples & singles focuses on female agency is a brilliant idea and profitable business model however attending cocktail-parties where you might fondle your friend’s partner if she approaches you in her Agent Provocateur is not how you join the sexual ‘elite’ your use of the word smacks of euphemism and amateurism Emma. How you join the sexual ‘elite’ Emma is you receive an unsettling letter from someone like me – leaning heavily on the unsettling here Emma – your ability to wrap your head and heart around what I am saying determining your level of membership far more effectively than any credit card purchase or saucy profile picture. So you have a choice Ma’am. You can step into the shadowy corridors of sex among the 0.01% or you can stay with the comfortably civilized aspirational 14% but before you make your decision Emma let me give you an idea what the difference is between the two as relates to group-sex experiences: orgy-party business like Killing Kittens and an elite sex-cult like LLWAM. The former is about exclusive invite lists, lingerie, maybe masks, swinging and sexual experimentation in front of your friends; the latter is about using incestuous Satanic and Sadomasochistic Earth Majik Ritual to brainwash people, cultivate telepathic connections between participants, and affect socio-political and geo-economic changes. It takes a certain degree of bravery to attend an orgy party but as long as the affair is ‘discrete’ the risks are slight and the rewards significant but limited to petty careerism and occasional diversity in partners and positions. Joining an elite sex cult on the other hand means pledging your life and death to an organized criminal gang, engaging in sacrificial and bloodletting ritual, extreme sadomasochistic relationship dynamics including consensual or non-consensual ( sex cultism can be used for good or evil. I like to believe I’m on the good side but I am as flawed as any human ) sex-slavery and sacred prostitution, departing from the 3rd dimension, and taking responsibility for the entire planet’s evolutionary process with ur kinky bonin with ur family members. Sex-cultism is ‘elite’ not because it is kept an absolute secret from general public and you have to be on the paying invite list to get in the door but because the lifestyle is not for your average or even above average ambitious professional willing to try a masked nudie-ball hosted by a reputable enterprise like Killing Kittens in a friend’s mansion by-and-by there simply aren’t that many people want to be in a sex cult performing sex acts required for ‘ogry party’ to wander into ‘sex cult’ territory Emma – in my investigations I have found many ( I dare say most? ) sex cults of the recent past have been unethical I think because finding consenting participants is not so easy – easier I think ( if less effective ) to use non-consenting sex-slaves ( research MK Ultra mind-control programming Emma – have you watched Eyes Wide Shut? Why are the only consistently naked people at the pseudo-religious orgy skinny young white women? a bias would be symptomatic of brainwashing used on sex-slave ‘models’ for the selfish entertainment of covert ‘elites’ but sex cults are far more powerful when they use consenting adults of all genders engaged in nudist ritual for clearly stated socio-political purposes ). I’m curious Emma whether you are interested in attending an actual for real ‘elite’ sex party or whether you are happy to stick to giving the upper-middle-classes a bitty taste for their hard earned money. Either way if you carry on in the orgy party business you will meet me again. Bye.

Andrea Coates

the Difference between an Orgiastic-Party and a SxxxCult is  
Incestuous Rape 
deny and hide and keep making movies. 
apologize, make up, and take over a country
Yayhey Ring Bells for the New Royal Family of Canada
go North - get bush whacked

"I did not have Sexual Intercourse with that Woman"
"at least....I dont think...I did?....why would I do such a thing? Im an upstanding gentleman I must impress absolutely everyone including her I'll show her how above juvenile delinquents I am by ignoring her crude attempts to flirt hahahahahaha flirt with me hahahahaha pathetic sick girl got dumped by my son let it ruin her life turn her into a porn-star her parents must be ashamed hahahahahaha Bang Bang I'm the Judge who is never ever ever wrong ever about anything ever."
"awe that is a very cute drawing she made of my two sons when I wonder will they grow up to be me, the Haughty Judge, I mean Responsible Family Man. Grrrrrrr I wish I was a cute drawing. I deserve to be that adorable drawing woman-child. Slap REGULATIONS FINES! I'M FINE!"
"in the meantime a sullen drink to my Latent Despotism the Passive-Aggressive-Control-Fetish Narcissist Patriarch has brain-washed a Normie subUrban Family unable to recognize our Hypocritical Humbert's entrenched Self-Restraint for what it is: Dangerously repressed Erotic eNergy and I quote from Lolita: Exceptional virility ofen reflects in the subject's displayable features a sullen and congested something that pertains to what he has to conceal (p. 25). He's liable to kill a bitch for fucking his son and not him or himself out of shame for not acting. Mr lordly scowling making every decision clean plate after you use it Dear Wife teach those children to clean after themselves I must work so as to be admired Bummer I got Cancer but it wont kill me I'm too good for that ahhhh indeed how did that sick girl get to be the tuned observer of my pitiless personality? Is it all the time she spends in Psycho-therapy wondering why I wont talk to her about the miserable lie I live in? She should get a Job. She's a decent artist and writer she could be professionally successful and could marry one of my sons if she stopped being so sexy. Didnt her parents teach her a sexy whore is not a proper wife? That's what I taught my sons about women and look at those two champs - following the high-society script to a golf tee like commendable boys. Every model son of mine should become a Graduate Firefighter before marrying a Tasteful Woman like their Mother or Sister to rule! as Frightening Distant Providerfigure and Spiteful Social Judge which is why neither of them are married to any young woman until someone deals with my Venemous Snake. Feminism is turning women today into immodest whores lacking suitable Automatic Deference to the Baseless Authority of a Pretentious Self-adulating No-Fun Hung-up Old Man Stare like me. Are you writing this down Andrea? My thoughts would make a great book for your Decorating Class. Draw yourself a little less svelte next time cunt, dont you dare question a goddamn thing I say you fucking whore I will kick you in the ribs and throw you against a wall and then maybe just maybe you can suck my cock I'm sorry I mean date my son and come over for Christmas Dinner where hahahahahaha I will surely find some new reason to spit on your soul to cover up for how envious I am of my son for getting to have sex with the likes of you and selfishly lonely and deprived I am in my Cloak of Decency. Swoosh."

the Villian in your Epic Life Movie - is kkkkkkkkkk your Dad-Self kkkkkkkkkkkkk
Hey my Fellow Kids you know what you should Really get your Darth Dad for a Winter-Party this Year to help him with his Grumpy Mood Disorder?
"I am so Sorry little Girl. I love you. You're Funny." 
It's OkA I broke your Face on the internet

You are Welcome with Feminism

have a Merry Wintermas Fools!
you didnt want me but this Year I came to Dinner anyway
I hope you bought Maleficent her KNIVESS
Miss Claws 

Dear G’s Mom

Ideally this Winterfest I would like for you and your family to finally figure out that no amount of psychiatric therapy is going to convince me G’s unusual behavior towards me over the years stems from something other than his father’s sexual attraction to me. I was conditioned from a young and impressionable age to behave like a creepy man’s mistress. I don’t believe a girl from an educated middleclass home, various talents at her disposal and no interest in the money end, behaves like a neglected kept-women just because she's crazy nor do I think petty moralism nor an army of medical professionals nor a partner and child can unwrite my early pscyhosexual conditioning so here I am behaving like the M family mistress has had enough of this charade ruining any hope y’all might have had for a drama-free holiday season sorry not sorry. Even with impressive powers of denial and superficial straightface you guys have at your disposal I don’t think the M----s are going to be able to get together ever ever again without somebody pointing to the elephant in the room, I mean the woman left out in the cold – remember New Years 2004 G’s Mom? Did G leave me behind in the street in the snowstorm because he was embarrassed of having an intoxicated teenage girlfriend or has he diligently kept me away from his parents for more honorable reasons? I think unless like civilized adults you agree to get your husband a professional sex-worker for a girlfriend ( like me surprise! ) he is a danger to any woman either of your sons might try to bring home at any point in their young lives to meet you their nice mom, so either get your husband a consenting mistress for Christmas or wait until he’s dead or infirm for your sons to marry. That is harsh I understand and I wanted to talk with you in person with my counselor present but I think you think because your husband wishes human emotions can be run at his convenience schedule and the problem with the young woman accusing him of rape is going to vanish into the ether because you hope and pray and put your faith in modern medications – spot the parallels? because I do. That’s not a coincidence, that’s a Maleficent curse, Sleepy-Head, and it wont be lifted pretending Andrea Coates the crazy gothchik next door is not the taboo fetish crush of every man in your immediate family but rather a mentally-ill con-artist with unduly high self-esteem and sourceless boundary issues boy do I look sad from that perspective G's Mom. I love G. Has anyone ever told you they love G, Mom? He’s not exactly the most lovable kid on the block but I like him enough to risk being raped by his dad and coveted by his brother and call it professional sex-work and I very much doubt you are going to find another woman so clearheaded about and accepting of your male family’s incestuous proclivities. I am not a trivial woman B, and if your ashamed family continues to disrespect me I will go to the press and I will go to the government and I will point fingers and name names and not feel an ounce of regret because any effort to charge me with slander or harassment can be used as a springboard for a career in revolutionary feminist pornographic media, which, on the upside, can also provide a job for the soon to be jobless Judge JM. I suggest he and I open a fancy nightclub for politicians so to compensate you, his faithful wife and the appropriately-aged mother of his children, for how traumatizing I’m sure this has been for you: enjoy watching the otherwise useless lumbersexual AM take Justin Trudeau’s place. I speak the truth B which is more than can be said of your dopey sons or your husband the cloak. Love thy neighbor as thy self and do not underestimate her lest you underestimate yourself.

from Outcast Andrea

Bright Idea! whosoever first figures out I've been writing about them - Lana, G's Family, Shane Smith, Mark Zuckerberg, James Franco, Obama, the Hell's Angels, the Canadian Government, etc - wins! a yet to be determined Prize!